メ `why-is-chou` メ

...it is the scorpio's month `

2011-11-11T11:11:00.006+08:00

How long has it been?
i couldn't remember it anymore...

Pinkie was dead. (Or maybe it is me.)
From the deep depression until now,
i think i am started to get use to it.

But i still could not done much without her,
especially for the website revamp and my FYP.

Life is tough, i swear.

...the scorpio had spoke `
Say, it is the Scorpio's month again.
Which mean more people like me are born now.

Self-centered and controlling,
stubborn yet determined,
intelligent but emotional,
mystery thus puzzling...

Putting all together, we are simply dangerous...

But one fact that can not be denied,
people always love and hate us at the same time.

Like we have such a strong presence for our existence,
given such strong feeling to the people we know and we not know.
So it is not surprise if we impressed or offended someone,
when we are not notice.

Regardless who we are, what we do or how we look, -poker face-
Scorpio is passionate, and they really are.

If you have a TRUE Scorpio friend,
then you are really in luck.

(Using the word "TRUE" as i really don't take all people i know as friend.
i don't like to use "friend" to refer my friends either...)

'cause you will be laughing and crying a lot,
for all their unbelievable and unpredictable moves.

The truth is they will never show it.
But if you would have a friend who can betray the whole world for you,
that probably is HIM!

(Please keep that in mind...)

Akhem! ... ...now i am really not trying to sell myself here. -silenced-

i don't know what drive me and lead this entry to such content,
but as i always do i just wrote based on what i feel on that moment.

Oh well, maybe i will just call it a day!

...the chain of memories `
But i'd already beaten the game, Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories.
Wonder what else i can do...

...continue wishing for the day that never came. `

...a promise is a promise...

...one day it will be our light,
the light that brings us together...

...i'll be in your heart until that time comes. `

...why do people hurt each other? Why are there separations? `

2011-11-05T00:54:00.004+08:00

The morning rain has been visiting very so often lately,
i wonder where my sunny-chan had gone?

You know, that is such a hypnotizing moment on every morning,
like i have to hypnotize myself to wake up and go for class.

i am pretty much amazed,
how does people still manage to get in time for work or school?

...it is gonna be, The 7 Wonders of Chou` `

As you can see i was so free now in blogging,
which mean i was not able to resurrect my Pinkie yet.

But life goes on no matter what, so live on! (am i talking to somebody?)

...why are we hurting each other? `
Say, i really don't like the racist people. -displeased-

Like how i don't like the politicians,
as they are so fake and always playing with the racist issues.
Not for anything but to obtain their political goals,
and fulfilling their fantastic-lunatic's dream.

But here, who i am really targeting is those who judged them as racist,
yet they don't realize themselves are turning racist too when they speak.

Like we know, one doesn't mean the whole.
If you think he is evil then it is just the matter of his,
it doesn't mean the everybody of his race is evil too, isn't it?

Instead of criticize them,
why not we try our best to correct them?

(so much of Theory X and Theory Y that i learnt...)

Now, we are living in here together,
why there is such a need to discriminate others on their differences?

(Why should we content ourselves to a single thing,
and not open up to absorb all the good from everywhere?)

...i simply don't get it. `

...when can we come to an understanding? `

Another thing is for the working boss out there,
i just don't see it how the Theory X still applicable nowadays.

Perhaps me and my friend have total different personality?
But i think my perspective is what the future needs! -shy-

Say, i can already see the generation change as i move into society.

Anyway i will leave this topic for next time,
if i still have the mood to continue it.

It is a long post for today,
so let's just give it an end.

...switched off.

...like the flowers that sway, dancing in the wind,
and like the rain enriching the earth,
this world exists throught unity, and yet...

...why do people hurt each other? Why are there separations? `

...the time is not with me `

2011-11-02T17:15:00.010+08:00

It has been 1 whole week now and the new adapter is NOT HERE YET!

The only reply i get is,
"Sorry sir, it will take another ~~damn~~ WEEK!"

(Yeah... right! like i can do anything about it.)

i just don't understand why must it be now?

When i just received a new job,
when m FYP only left like with 1 more month to due,
and try not to mention the 2 pending assignments...

i really can't do a freaking thing now.
It is impossible to explain in word,
how much i needed my dearest Pinkie.

i...just feel so helpless. -emo-

...your hug, i just can't reach it `
Day by day... time flies and nothing could have done.
Seeing the workloads are getting heavier as time left,
i know the "First Class" is getting further and further from me.

Now, i can do nothing but to sleep more for the coming weeks,
so maybe when i can start my work i don't have to sleep anymore?
(what a fantastic dream.. Hahahaa...)

i got to say, the time is not with me.
But i have not give up on myself yet.

...if Chou` can not do it, no one can! `

ps. ...just kicked the chair and walking is so painful now.

...i don't want to have to force you to smile,
i'm here to help you notice the rainbow...

...'cause i know what's in you is out there `

...worry, is not for me `

2011-10-12T21:55:00.006+08:00

And you ask me why i am blogging now?
Actually i do not know either.

...maybe i just feel like to blog... perhaps? `

i am getting up a bit lazy for fixing things already, -tired-
especially for those which wasn't even me to break it at the first place,
but they are just evilly concerned me.

i wonder if things would work up fine in the end?
Or rather, i hope so.

...need to say more? `
It is really not easy,
when you got so much of things to ~~worry about~~ take care of.
i simply dislike the term "worry" as it makes me feel weak.

However i believe the greater person have greater responsibility on him,
so i would gladly take on any challenges if it seems to happen that way.

(Now, why it suddenly sounds like a cheering entry sia?)

i was kind of demotivated when i recieved my last results.
But seeing my friends graduating one after another,
i know it is not time yet for me to slack off.

Where is the once Great-Old-Chou` had gone?
The one who is confident in everything and anything,
the one who can just change the world with a single Mind CLICK!

...oh well. i miss HIM ` (Awwwww ~ <3)

Undoubtedly, music got its magic to calm everything down.
i am actually opening this window just so i can get the music play.
It somehow can keep my tension away.

Now i got my hand full on this FYP.
It is really tough for one to write 10 thousand words all by his own, huh?
With extent of everything wrote need to be cited from somewhere else.

Guess if others can do it, then that's no way i can not.
But well, what if others can't do it either?

...then i MUST DO IT, since i am the extraordinary! `
(Like i always told myself that.)

...smile `
Okayy, i think this is it.
i'd said more than what i wanted to say.

Time to go.

...i held you in my arms, full of loneliness,
because i didn't know anything else...

...i can't reach it alone, with fragile words such as "wish" `

...Thought it. DO it `

2011-08-23T11:30:00.007+08:00

It has been about a month now after my last exam.

And to be honest,
i have not done much about my FYP work ever since then.
(Seriously... not much.)

Feel kind of guilty about that,
but i don't know where to start or even how should i start.

...wondering how my mates have their FYP progress now? `

...this is just what you need for the day `
Sitting in the McDonald's nearby a highway,
having my 3rd or maybe 4th cup of hot coffee.

It is a cold rainy morning and the coffee is just nice,
i do enjoying it much. -loved-

BUT... why the hell am i going out on a cold rainy day like this?!!
(i am suppose to sleep soundly like i suppose to...)

"GREAT THANKS" to the freejing,
who asked me out on this early morning,
and yet, he is late for like 30 minutes to the promised time. -growl-

Anyway i still find it hard to believe that,
i came out today just to look after his stupid car from clamping.
(And it is early in the morning some more...)

Like i always say and still saying,
it is the greatest gift he have in life that he know me.

...in fact, everyone who know chou` is gifted, i suppose ` -shy-

Oh well... enough for that.

i just thinking i should really get something written for my FYP.
Or, i should really get more articles and journals to read about?

Why can't i be more productive throughout this break?

Sigh... `

...if you think you should do it,
just stop thinking and go for it...

...'cause we might not live for tomorrow `

...when you lose your email `

2011-08-17T22:06:00.002+08:00

Some days ago i got my email address suspended.

It happened due to the recent hacked,
then mass spammy mails were sent from my account.
(Though, i already stopped it on the 2nd day i noticed that.)

Anyway i made my sincere apologize to the affected persons,
for thus and explained about the case happened.
But still my account was reported by someone,
and that caused my account suspended...

...now i wonder who's that? ` (不悦)

...bring me back to life `
Before i ever knew it,
i am already affected by the modern sickness.

For that night i lost my account,
i think i lost myself as well.
i was so uncomfortable and felt so unsecured,
simply can't seem to concentrate on doing anything.

And while i realised i can't sign in my MSN with that,
that is the moment i felt like... totally SOLITARY. (Even that i am not...)

But MSN simply has a "well" recovery plan to worse thing up,
for that it keeps showing me error over and over again...
But for the good side,

...i still managed to get back my account after one night. ` -thankful-

Say, after returning to my coolness self,
then i start to think about it.
A personal email is actually so much important.

Perhaps it is wrong for the others,
but in my case it is personal and security issues concerning.
(For what are the issues, i will not speak about here.)

Anyway that is all my personal experience about it,
wonder what will you be if the same thing happens to you?

But for the greatest good,
hope this will never ever happen again to any of us.

*Walked away...*

...i am about to lose my mind,
you have been gone for so long,
i am running out of time...

i need a doctor, call me a doctor...

...i need a doctor, doctor to bring me back to life `

...if i die young `

2011-08-10T00:51:00.004+08:00

Would you ever thought of it?
Or will such thought ever come across your mind..?

But somehow it happened to me.

i mean, it is kind of weird.
Like i doubt normal people would ever have that in mind.

...in fact, i think they will never even want to think about it. `

...what would you be playing in the end? `
The thought first started since 2 or 3 years ago,
which i couldn't well remember it.
But it is during the time,
of when i joined the funeral of my friend's mom. -quiet for while-

From then i asked,
"Why must it always be the same old songs play in funeral?
Can't i have something more trendy or different from those?"

But first thing first,
it is not that i'm being disrespect to the decedent anyway.

Right now i am having a habit,
of keeping record of the songs i heard,
especially for those which could give me a thought or touched.

Why i am doing so?
'Cause i want them to be played during my funeral.

Ya, you ~~hear~~ see me right,
it is MY FUNERAL i mean.

Rather than those traditional plays,
won't you like your life to end with your favourite rhythm?

...either way you will be floating for a very long time then. `

...something like the rhythm of love? `

Would not it be nice if the funeral will be playing songs like,

"1000 Words" "Bye Bye" "说了再见" "Mad".... etc.

Yuppz. i think the funeral is gonna be fun,
like i don't really like people crying for my dead... or maybe i do.

It is fine if you are sad for it,
but then not to be over saddened,
like not too long.

Just think of me on the free time after i am gone,
that would be all i need. -smile-

Okayz. or maybe they are all just my personal opinion...
(Like of course they are mine, whose blog do you think this is?)

...the last rhythm of life. FIN `
Anyway i have take way too long to write up here.
i think i will stop.

And need not worry, my funeral will not be any so soon.
i am not giving up my life YET!

So, make sure you come back for more.

# FIN.

...if i die young, bury me in satin,
lay me down on a bed of roses,
sink me down in the river at dawn...

...send me away with the words of a love song `

...the end of examing life, it's just so cool `

2011-08-04T18:46:00.004+08:00

Just officially finished my exam life, which i suppose so.
Unless i will be pursuing for Master level next time?

...but i doubt that. `

Despite what happen during my SPM last paper,
i think i simply have the potential to be silly.

(To learn more about it please find back the post yourself,
i think i did mentioned once or twice...)

Like this too the last paper of exam as last time,
but i actually forget to bring my phone out.

i only realised it when i am half way to the exam hall,
though, i didn't turn back to retrieve it.
'Cause you know what, i am actually 10 minutes late to it. -shy-

Luckily there is a 10 minutes reading time for every paper,
so for somehow i still make it in time.

But even for this the ~~last paper~~ last exam i have,
also i would get incident as such happened...

...besides silly, i can't find a better word for myself `

...will i ever be writing again? `
Now that everything has come to an end,
i think i can finally use some rest. -relieved-

What i am looking forward now probably is the Singapore trip.
But like everything is not really on plan yet,
so i will just leave it for now.

Gotta' have a break first before i start my journey again.

Will update again soon. `

...i really not like people disturbing in my private space,
especially when it is without my acknowledgement ...

...please keep your distance with me, unless i say so `

...a lot of things in mind now `

2011-07-26T19:22:00.001+08:00

~~FML!~~

i really do not like to use this term for myself,
as it makes me sound like a weakling.
(i am still not using it.)

But seriously things are getting so damn there!
Like i just went for my Midpoint Presentation,
and i got ffk-ed again just like how it happened with my first supervisor.

Why can't i just have a smooth troughout for my FYP? (Sigh...)

To top that all, i still have to tell them, "It's ok."

Like how can it be okay when you just wasted your hours for nothing?
But we simply don't and can't have any other answer to give.

...if i would cry... in the dark, in the rain `
There is really alot of things in my mind now,
and sincerely sorry if i misbehave.

...need some time staying in the darkness, til i found my light. `

So... i think that's all for today.

...the world of a scorpio is beyond your imagination `

...你听得到 `

2011-07-25T20:04:00.002+08:00

"人因为有了想法有了坚持而完整,
发生了过去了管它的"

"...与其找个理由去后悔不如换个形式去检讨 ` "

So tomorrow is my Mid-Point presentation.
To be frank, the requirement is to complete up to Chapter 3,
but i have not done it yet like you-know-why.

All i can do is to put what i have into the slides,
and hope that it is acceptable by the advisor.
(And i don't feel like cheating anyway.)

Come to the next part of this mess,
exam is on next coming week.

Like, i know it right~
i have not done with my final revision yet ._. -Crap!-

Anyway this will be my VERY FINAL EXAM to sit for, i guess.
Since i don't think i will be taking any other exam after this,
and it is full in-course on the coming semester, well.

...i am so gonna miss the exam, NOT `

But it is true that i need to go now.
Better off for some studies...

Though, will get back to you soon.

ps. ...blame yourself too much and you will be stink ` :X

...what does a group means to you? `

2011-07-21T23:13:00.001+08:00

Just got back my result for CMI modules. -Shy-
Overall i think it is not that bad,
like by all mean it is within my expectation anyway.

...though, i still hope that i got an A `

...losing myself `
Say, i just did my most awkward presentation today.
Like you know what,
there is Group and Individual part to present.

Common sense kayz.
The group part should be done together,
then only we proceed to the individual, right?

Here, we are in a group of 3, but guess what?
According to our "leader", he said...

"We will present his group and individual, your group and your individual,
then my group and my individual..."

Can you imagine what i look like when heard him saying that?
Or why not you tell me what will you be like,
when you heard your group leader saying something like this...

But what worse is that the other member,
he actually comes to agree with him,
like i am the only one who is wrong... -freaked-

Of course you can expect what comes next from the lecturer then,
unless you are with them as well...

Frankly speaking, i am not expecting much from it since the beginning.
And i quite gave up on the group marks already,
but i just never expect them can go this far beyond...

...and yes, i am upset about the comments given. ` -sign-

Why can't people just act as a group,
when they're brought into one.
(It is not like i volunteer myself to join anyway.)

Hopefully this is the last group i have for my degree level,
like i've had enough of it already.

...this is not the idea `
Okayy, i think i had brag enough.
Anyway life goes on no matter how sucks it is.

Most importantly i think i have found my resolves from the dream.
Like i have know what is it i need and i want for now.
Hope this doesn't cheat me and keeps me going.

And it is time for me to have my tiramisu~ -yummy-

i will take my leave now...

...all i need is being able to
scoop up happiness with a tiny spoon...

...as long as i have someone to share it with `

...have you been there? Bon Odori 2011 `

2011-07-19T15:27:00.004+08:00

Guess what, the Bon Odori 2011 just ended last week,
and i missed my chance of going there again this year.

It is just sad when you got place to go,
but your friends wouldn't tag along, don't you agree?
Though, myself also lazy to drive there with such a terrible trafic.

...anyway i still enjoy traveling alone in the near future. ` (笑)

...kawaii-neh? `
Apparently neither the girl nor the kid is me.
It is just a random search from Facebook and i found this anyway.
(And i hope she don't mind if i use her picture here or something.)

The world is seriously so small, though.
i do not found her through any mutual friends or whatever,
but plainly random finding.

And what surprised me was the further "research" shows that,
we are actually from the same high school.

...say, i am not really that good of stalking, really. ` (无辜)

i think that is getting pretty far from the topic already,
so... let's just keep it going.

i am having quite a mess on my school works lately,
by all thanks to our great mighty lecturer, Mr. J-sama.

Okayy. Who knows maybe he is not really the person to blame about,
but i just don't know where should i throw my anger to.
Perhaps i should blame on APIIT system?
But that still won't change the fact i am frustrated.

Top of that there are still some in-game issues, outside projects,
and personal resolves that bugging me at the moment.

...i hope i can care less about it. `

Says, why not we have some fun on other thing such as this.

...what's the first 3 words you see? `
As the description says about it,
the first 3 words you found will describe about you.

It is just a game so please don't take it seriously,
but personally i found it quite true in some sense, though.
Why not you just give it a try?

Opps! And before i forget the words i found are,
fool, sad and happy.

Are they making any sense to you?

ps. ...the tears of a clown ` -soft laugh-

...有人按错门铃有人打错电话,
有人制造喧哗的八卦...

...麻烦大家让我静一下好吗? `

...好久不见 `

2011-07-11T00:47:00.002+08:00

This has been so long.
i mean really seriously very crazy long,

i almost couldn't remember my password to come back here, NO.
It is still the same password i used for other resources,
but it is true that Pinky had forgotten it. -apologize-

So what made me stop blogging for so long?
The school works perhaps?
Haha... please don't ask me...

And now then i realise,
the last post was stopped at such a sensitive date.
i hope people not thinking much about it, though.
(or i think it is just me that always think too much.)

Really, i am about to finish my final year first semester.
The overall experience was that,
everything feel so easy and free, but yet i am like so busy.
And sometime, i don't really know what i am doing...

It sucks!
i mean that kind of feeling. (无奈)

...she will be there `
Oh well. i just can't think of a way to express what's in my thought now.
Wonder why i am blogging now anyway. -fall into silent-

If only there would have someone,
who could just look into my eyes,
and know what i am thinking...

(Ya.. i believe, the one is still there.)

Not sure which sense of mine wanted this,
but i just feel like giving a chinese title on this post.

i am not really that random, wasn't i?

...walked away `

...一路嗅著追著美梦,
爬上屋顶意外跌得好重...

...不觉得痛是觉得空 `

...will i ever see them once again? `

2011-02-28T13:57:00.003+08:00

...the day in the past `
Have you ever have something planned so long,
but ended you never have the chance to talk about it?

How would you ever feeling down and quiet suddenly,
while everyone around is so happily laughing?

Or why will you sometime feel like staying alone,
when you are going out with a gang of friends...? `

Today is the day, but actually i am thinking it is yesterday.
The day we met the old grannies in SecretRecipe. (3 years back then...)
i told myself i shall come back here every year,
but seems that i am one day late for this year.

Though, it is okay.
i doubt even if i came here on time every year,
i will ever met them again.

But if you asking why i still came?
Perhaps there just be some time i wanted to be alone,
and there just be something i wanted to remember... `

Funny huh? but i do kinda like the environment here.
The chair is so comfortable,
the place is clean,
and there are cakes everywhere! -yummy!-

Okayy. Now it seems like i start talking nonsense already.
i shall stop for today.

ps. ...the Pisces is gifted, and i just want to tell them Happy Birthday `

...somewhere in my memory i've lost all sense of time,
and tomorrow can never be...

...'cause yesterday is all that fill my mind `

...hated this part of me `

2011-02-16T12:26:00.003+08:00

...is this what everyone used to do? `
Communicate, you say?
What a joke?
Sorry. but it is not happening here... `

Okayy. now i finished my last paper on last Friday.
i can officially say this year 2 is ended now,
and the year 3 is coming on 24th March hopefully. -pray-

i think i seriously need to get rid of this habit,
have been writing and saving draft all this while.
Never have the chance to publish,
but i deleted them.

i not sure if it is just something i don't want others to read,
or maybe i just hope myself not reading it...

...whatever it is, i am trying to publish all the post i wrote now `

And last 2 days was the Valentine's Day... ...
and now i stucked here as i don't know how to continue.

It is actually something i would know,
but i just refuse to get myself to.
i don't know what more to say,
but...i just hate this part of me. (sorry chou`...)

ps. ...though, it is fine. even angels got their wicked schemes. `

It'd be so much easier if i was able to hate you,
because i always remember you, in situations like this...

...i wonder...why did we meet each other? `

...Chinese New Year BLUE ` '11

2011-02-03T21:26:00.006+08:00

Okay. It is the first day of Chinese New Year,
but i am sorta having this CNY BLUE now.
Like it just happens every year,
since the day that i could not remember...

i wonder why but like everytime everyone around is feeling happy,
i will feel down without any reason.

And i can actually make it even bottom if i would give myself the reason,
but it is not something i will do while i still have the control.

...Oh well. Let's try snap out of it from this emo feeling ` -smile-

...the awesome-est book ever `

...i know i am still a noob on this `
You know what, i did my blood donation for the second time!
It happened only yesterday which also the CNY Eve.

i bet that is gonna be the most productive thing,
and perhaps the most meaningful one i had done for this holiday.
Like i tried to study for the upcoming exam today,
but it just did not going anywhere i want.

Say, just why people like CNY so much?
i try to figure it out but i never did,
maybe i will never understand like i am never a family person.

i can't stand people taking it as an excuse for visiting,
nor i can stand people only thought of money when it comes to CNY.

...i think CNY actually mean much than that isn't it? ` (harmony...?)

Getting like family reunion is one other thing,
but i just don't like people visiting somehow,
especially when there are kids along. -spare me-

Not to mention that i don't like kids when they are noisy,
but i feel sorry seeing them got nothing to do but sitting there.
Like they don't even know who i am and i not know who they are either.

But luckily i got Pinkie with me in room now,
else they will be standing behind me like i am still using desktop back then.
Just that i see them once every year,
but yet i know who they are, even now...

All that i know now is i am so freaking hungry! -craving-
And that is just one of the another reason that i don't like CNY.

ps. ...Happy Chinese New Year to you if you still reading `

i wonder...why did we meet each other? `

...chou` is back! `

2011-01-25T11:48:00.009+08:00

Okayy. i am back.
Sorry about that like i know i have been away for so long.
It is been like months, years or probably centuries,
since i did my last entry here.

But on top of that...i am back! ` -glad-

Say, there is a lot happenings when i was away,
and it is nearly impossible for me to list them out here one after another.

Like so i had forgotten to wish my best-est readers, followers...
Merry Christmas`~!
Happy New Year`~!!

and perhaps... Gong Xi Fa Cai`~!! as well.
(it is just around the corner anyway.)

...the tear of a clown, like nobody would know `
Oh well. this is really suffering,
when you know you wanted to blog but you just can't.

i admit that i lost the urge of blogging some days back there,
but when i finally found back that mood of writing,
i just have to spend it on my assignment.
What a sad life it is. -sigh-

Actually the assignment is not done yet,
but i just can't resist it from here anymore.
Though, i still have to go now.

...will be back soon enough `

...i hear "The Tear of a Clown" and i hate that song,
i always feel like they talking me when it comes `

...perhaps, this is goodbye for us `

2010-12-13T23:45:00.003+08:00

What else i can say now,
when no one ever listened to me as i am telling,
and now it happened everything is just too late.

...just what's more you expect me to SAY?! ` -Mad-

These is no point to hide my feeling now,
but i just never expect myself to be this sad.
In fact, i am crying while i am writing this down.

i think i won't mind if he would just die like that.
But to see him suffered these many days,
and yet he can make it in the end.
i feel so terrible as i should just kill him some days ago. -i mean it-

And i still feel so happy when i back home just now,
seeing him like feeling better, but who knows... ...

Ya. who knows...? (If only i would know...)

...he is always a camera-shy `
This is probably not the best photo,
but i think it is the only photo i ever took with him.
Like maybe 2 years or 3 years ago?
i can't remember...

i... don't know what else i can say anymore...
And until today, he still never ever had an actual name...

Anyway... ...perhaps, this is goodbye for us `

...i still remember the day when i first saw him,
he is only just as big as my slippers... `

...hard liquid, no? `

2010-12-09T14:12:00.008+08:00

Seems like i am getting lazier on my blog,
but i just don't feel like posting something for nothing.

...we need a break when we need a break `
Anyway went for some assignment-break at Genting View Resort,
with the usual gang but maybe 1 or 2 are missing.

Oh well` that was fun but not as much as i was expecting.
Perhaps it is the lack of humans?
Or i just miss the last time we went Genting?

To be frank, i am much enjoyed with the House-Opening Ceremony.
i know i drank quite a lot that night,
but i don't think that is the reason,
caused me to drink only 2 glasses on the Genting night.

...probably i am over with the stage when people craves for hard liquid? `

The hair recently is not in any good condition,
somehow i feel that it is so....DEAD.

i wonder why.
It happened like this since i came down from Genting.
Feel like giving it a cut,
but i don't think that would help much.

As always, that kind of bothering my mood.
Guess it will takes some time til i can move back to assignment-mode.

ps. ...having the feeling like i am missing something again `

...my emotions pile up like fallen debris,
where do they think they're going? `

...first time ever happening in colleges `

2010-12-01T16:06:00.009+08:00

...clip it going `
You better believe it.
But i think this is the first time ever happening in APIIT,
or probably among other colleges as well.

...students actually ask for an EARLIER submission date for assignment! `

(Yes. you know you hear me right.)

How often we hear it from the lecturers,
about their students wanted to postpone the due date or so.

But i am sure this will be something new for you,
as we're requesting to bring forward the submission date.
And i use "we" because i really do mean OUR CLASS.

You probably think that,
"What's so surprise for bringing it 2-3 days earlier? "

But i am telling you,
we actually ask for 1 month earlier. DOOD!

If you are a student or once a student you should know,
how much it means for 1 day when it comes to assignment.
And now you can start imagine as it is 1 MONTH we're talking about!

Anyway this request is yet approved,
but we are all so ready for it. -laugh-

...it might be a mess but it is how we work `
You know, i think this is what happen when the IT students go insane.
It kinda reminds me of someone who has been telling me IT sucks.

But think of it now,
they probably just jealous of our talents and efficiency,
don't you agree with me? -stare-

ps. ...we will change the history `

...sometime i hate...sometime i love
...sometime i hurt...sometime i don't

...but if it's from you i don't mind hurting `

...how can you resist it? ~``

2010-11-26T23:39:00.004+08:00

...how can you resist it? ~``
Finally! It is been so long i waited for this moment to come.
And now it was right in front of my very eyes! -blinking-

You know, i have been telling people how i wanted to try it.
Not just because i think it is nice or if it looks nice,
but seriously it is really nice too.

Really please, don't doubt me when i say it is nice.
'cause it is supported by the fact that,
ChunKiat actually finished it faster than me!

If there would be a rating for APIIT's food,
i am sure i will rate this spaghetti as my first choice.
Second...might be the chicken rice or Deli Nasi Lemak,
but who care about the second when the spaghetti is so damn NICE !

Though one thing i hope the cheif would change,
is using the meatballs instead of sausages.

But again consider on its price,
when it only costs RM6.90 here for such a nice SPLENDID FOOD,
i think i don't mind having the sausages.
After all, it is the spaghetti and sauce that matter.

Oh well` before i make myself crave for a second one,
i better stop talking about it.

Seriously, i can die a happy man now.

ps. ...have you counted how many "nice" i use in this post? `

...for my friends and friend's friend ` -SPM '10

2010-11-22T22:02:00.001+08:00

Guess what? i am now sitting on the lecturer's seat,
using the LAN cable and writing for my blog! -grin-

But speaking of which,
i keep reminding myself and i keep forgetting about it.
i should be careful now for what i wrote,
as we will never know who is reading it.

But that is not the point yet.
The main point is that last time... ...*Akhem*
i accidently tell my lecturer about this blog,
and now she knows the link already!

Okay. if she ever find out that i talk bad about her. i am DOOM ! ._.

[Continue...]

i tend to finish this post before my class end,
but seems like i can't make it.

Anyway we are having this SPM starts tomorrow.
and when i say "we" it actually means for my friends.

But whatsoever. i just feel myself become such a silly again.
Like the Google Result told me that the first day ~~is on 22nd~~,
but when it is actually 23rd instead.

So seriously i do my wishing/blessing yesterday without noticing it,
and now i have to do it all over again... damn! -.-

...go as high as you can but be ready to break the limit `
Say, it is going to be NOW Or NEVER !
This will be the payback time for your ALL-TIME-EFFORT!

But if you never made any effort so far,
then i am sorry to tell you that you... ...
Oops! that is the forbidden word which can not be said now.

Oh well. but one last thing i must say for you is...

All The BEST & Be The BEST
(and be ready to get smell 'cause you have chou` by your side. LOL)

ps. ...do get enough of sleep for yourself as that is very crucial as well `

...this is not the end. this is not the beginning `

...and we met this girl `

2010-11-18T15:46:00.006+08:00

So here i am again,
but rather than OldTown, it is Starbucks today.

Anyway last Tuesday was Kah Kiat's 21st birthday.
He invited us to his celebration at Full Wealth Restaurant,
somewhere near Kepong... as that's all i know about the location.

And at there... ... ...(detail skipped)

We met this girl, name Suki,
who means to be Kah Kiat's cousin.
even though they do not seem like knowing each other,
i heard no converstaion between them during that night. (Cousin..? LOL)

...anyway quite a nice girl i suppose, but shy? No idea. `

...i know where you're looking but i am trying to show the sign `

Okayy. enough talking about girl. -shy-

Say, this is the 3rd time of it already.
Whenever i try to make it earlier to the class,
the class will just cancel without any pre-notice.

Damn annoyed, you know?
But even if i have to complain about it,
i have no idea who i should refer to.

(Bored me from my toes to my face.)

Whatsoever. i think i will just stop here today.

ps. ...ne fait aucun doute. Elle est jolie `

...though the words sound steady,
something empty's within 'em `

...THANKS MOM for bringing me to this world, 21 years ago `

2010-11-13T01:13:00.005+08:00

It is been like 5 years or 6 now,
i was making this same wish every year on this day,
but i am not doing it anymore...

For this long it is not getting any nearer to it,
why should we still wish for it? -thought of something-

...what am i still waiting for? `
And i was saying all the time, celebration is not my style.

What if it is true? Or maybe it is not.
Or MAYBE, i was just trying to reserve it for some people.
But like when the person never shown up anyway...

Perhaps i can say it is an exception for last year,
though thing is not exactly what i have in mind.

...but even just for that i can be so much happy with it. `

In fact, i think i was just afraid.
Afraid of, what if the person never show up...?
(Try to give an excuse before things go ugly?)

Seriously i can be much simple than you thought.
i don't actually need the last word,
for as long you do mean it, i will feel.
Believe me that it is true.

Just everytime on this day when i look at my facebook profile,
i can't say that i am not happy...
But it somehow makes me feel lonely as well,
like how i'd said it on the previous entry.

Though, that does not mean i don't find people who i do appreciate,
and it won't be listed here as you know who you are.

...when the hope is still around `
Say, if there would be one last thing i wanted to say for today,
it will never be ~~Happy 21st to Myself! ~~~ but...

...THANKS MOM for bringing me to this world, 21 years ago. `

...and what if i had you and what if you had me,
what's the reason we can't fall in love?

...what if... ... What if...? `

...honestly. screw it `

2010-11-08T21:48:00.003+08:00

...honestly. screw it `

Honestly, my day was totally SCREWED !

Woke up extra early this morning,
and had my breakfast at McDonald nearby TPM.
All these to ensure myself not late for this morning 8.45am class,
which i usually late for half hour or 40 minutes.

But what happened was... ...the lecturer took a leave.

Planned to have my dinner outside after my last class,
which supposingly to end on 5 something or 6pm.
Left only empty food at home,
like already decided to go OldTown @ Sri Petaling for dinner.

But what actually happened was... ...the class was told cancelled at 1.

Now all the effort had goes into vain,
what else i can say about my day?

i do not know. But if you may know please let me know.

ps. ...and the dinner now is sucks `

...if you want to say something,
please mean it.

...if you are not mean it, please save it `

...a late Halloween story `

2010-11-05T16:17:00.009+08:00

So it is the Halloween Nightz,
i think not much i would want to talk about it,
like since that was not much happening to me.

It is good to say that i was not alone on that night,
CheapJing, chelle, her friend-Sally and the dad were the company.

First went for some "suppose-party" on SkyBar @ Traders Hotel,
but they only serve those who make reservation,
and obviously we didn't.

That's what we called, the last minute plan ._.
(Oops. and there goes 20 bucks for parking for nothing.)

So we went on a search for the next club,
but apparently most clubs were full due to the Halloween Eve.
And it was like 1 hour or 2 hours later,
we finally settled down in G6 Club on Gardens Rooftop.

The environment here is nice, is cool.
i actually like the songs playing at the begining,
but it turned out to be just so so...later on.

...it was just heineken `
Though, the worst thing was...

We are sitting at the side where mostly for the 60's, 70's...
And knowing all the 80's or 90's girls,
are on the other side just few distance from us.

But YET we are going to them! (WHY?!) -.-

It is really fine with me for they having LIVE Band or no,
but i would prefer a HITz DJ instead.

...you know, in which case i am just twenty here `
(so what's this suppose to mean?)

...what else i can say? Happy Diwali `
Anyway it was Deepavali today.

As it is on Karthi's invitation,
i went to his house on noon with my coursemantes.

The lunch was treated by his family.
Even though it is all for vegetarian,
but i kinda like the "fish" as it got no bones! LOL

Also the murukku is nice,
like i think it is the first time i am having it,
and i don't think i can have it anywhere else.

...anyway i am so much satisfied with it ` -smiled-

(And thanks for the food, if he possibly be reading this.)

Say, i think that is so much for today.
i will be taking my leave now.

...you don't get another chance, life is no Nintendo game `

...where is all the fun i want had gone? `

2010-10-30T15:56:00.009+08:00

The hair wasn't well in condition these few days,
it quite pulled my mood down along. -Lv.1 Depressed-

i am thinking of getting a hair cut. (maybe on Tuesday?)
It is not like i am going to keep my hair short,
but i just don't like it when it is blocking my sight.

Besides, if you want to keep it growing,
you have to fix the part that was not growing well anyway :)

Say, this semester suppose to be quite relax for me,
but somehow i start to feel that it is driving me busy.

Perhaps it is the Toturial i got for every single week?
Or it is the weekly progress checking for assignments?
And while i was still wondering what's the causes of it,
this is already the week 6 now.

i should better stop wondering and slacking,
time to get myself work on things i suppose to work on -spirit up!-

...not quite in the mood. but i will be fine `

By the way speaking of which,
it is the Halloween tomorrow!

You know, i just feel like getting a drink or something.
But like the Malacca trip was turned down,
Genting is not going to be any so soon yet.

...where is all the fun i want had gone? `

i am not a person who can work up for long.
Whenever my workload reach a certain limit,
i will seriously need a break,
or i will just be lying there doing nothing. (Like now...)

Oh please. if anyone is reading this bring me out.
Or give me a good reason to get out.

That could save a life...

ps. ...miss the day i could stay in OldTown all day long `

...if i had you, life would be a party it'd be ecstasy `

...break time in APIIT `

2010-10-27T15:17:00.003+08:00

Okayy. here i am "enjoying" my 4 hours break now,
and i wasn't so happy about it.

Originally i thought of spending this break time,
by blogging, assignment-ing and maybe vending items in MonsterForest.
It is quite a productive plan, isn't it?

But the reality is always cruel,
and now i was so dissapointed by the UCTI wifi.
Like i can't even get on my facebook probably,
just how am i suppose to do my research on laws?

...trying to find it but it is impossible `

If you ask me, i was so wondering if there is anyone here,
watching the PPS a.k.a most evil-ish programme in the world.
For those who'd suffer from it before,
you should know what that suppose to mean.

So be it, no matter how much i blame,
it is not going to help and i know it. -psst!-

Say, i have not been blogging much lately,
so i should not be filling in all my posts,
with the negative energy, wasn't it?

Let's talk about something fun or cool or happier whatsoever, kayz?
Like..like... ... ...okayz. i don't know what else i can talk about.

...sounds like i become such a "no-hope" suddenly ` ._.

Oops. and i bet this is totally random but from now day onward,
i need to slack more at PappaRich instead of OldTown.

This is really so hard for me and such a big sacrifice,
but since this is for the sake of my group assignment,
i think i just have to do it.

Though, the most important thing of all,
i hope my team will compensate me for this,
or for the least please pay for what i eat. -dreaming-

...sometime. random is an art `

Finally i believe this is seriously an AWESOME RANDOM post.
i hate it when i update my blog just because i want to see some updates.

It is like i am wasting your precious time,
to read this such a meaningless post.
(trust me that is really not my intention at the first place.)

Anyway what's done is done,
i hope you haven't close your browser yet. so...

Better make sure i come out with something good,
something worthwhile reading on my next entry. -wink!-

And til then! `

...before i come undone,
save me from the nothing i've become `

...the irritating facebook status spammer `

2010-10-23T15:44:00.008+08:00

i know i have not been blogging much lately.
i used to blog it like once every 2 or 3 days,
but now as you can see...

The reason why is either i am so tired after my classes,
or i am just "a little" too addict to Monster Forest, maybe.

And, i do have some courseworks to complete. -busy life-

...some thought that never change `

Anyway i was feeling quite irritated by some facebook status recently.
For instance, a girl who keep brags about her boyfriend,
how the other girls keep talk to him, finding him..bla bla bla...

Jeez.. i really wonder how a guy can endure such a girlfriend,
but thanks god she got dumped now like i wasn't much surprise.

Just yet she'd stop bragging,
which really make me feel like deleting some friends.
~~(Oops. and i quite regret that i approved the friend request last time.)~~

Say, for some other case,
even if you're so lucky or unlucky got break-up,
you lost your love but why must you lose your pride as well?

Don't tell me you really think that,
begging on facebook would help recovering the relationship?
For me i feel that will only worsen the situation.

...no offence, but i think only a jerk will do so `

(begging on facebook = please don't ever come back?)

i really don't mind if you wrote it on your personal space,
like Blogspot, Xanga, Wordpress, LiveJournal, MySpace, whatsoever.

'Cause for that i have a choice of whether read it or not,
But when you do it on facebook, it just...DAMN !

Oh well. i need a longer hair for what i desire.

Will blog again, next time.

" ...single is simple, double is like peanut butter,
triple is trouble, quadruple is just terrible ` "
-via Keed Cheng

...what's on your mind? `

2010-10-17T19:17:00.004+08:00

"What's on your mind? "

And facebook keep asking me this question over and over again.
Just only if i can tell her that,

...i have totally no idea `

...what's on your mind? `
i am on Ah Dai's request today,
i need to be going out at late night 11pm... something like that,
quite wonder what time will i be home tonight.

Also now i am quite wonder,
if i should skip the morning classes for tomorrow as well.
Believe me, it is really not my intention to skip.

Just thinking that even if i go for the classes,
consider that i am insufficient of sleep,
i don't think i can concentrate in class either.

Oh well. we will see when the time has come.

...how you know it is from Google? `

And again, i received the letter from Google some days ago.
Finally they come to the decision to employ me!

You know, i am so happy like i can tell myself... STOP DREAMING !

Okayy. It is just another letter from them,
to promote their Google Ads service.
i received one from them year ago,
and now they sent me again.

But this time they printed my name on it,
instead of some title, Market Advertisement Manager.

Anyway i don't think i will have any use of it by now,
why not you tell me if you are interest so i will share it with you?

It is not much for an update today.

But... just whatever. :)

...no matter how i try, i don't find a reason why...
believe me, it's no lie...

...i always have you on my mind `

...but if i had you `

2010-10-12T17:48:00.005+08:00

You know, i really don't know what should i be feeling now.

Happy? For the reason you-should-know...
Or sad? Like i just want to see her be happy...
(It is ironic, seriously.)

But as usual i won't give a damn about what others say or think,
i will just do whatever i want, whatever i feel is right.

...whatsoever. i think i know what i should do now `

...solitary, might be the best medicine `
Sorry for such a random post,
and i know some of you might not understand what i am talking about.

Anyway i promise i will give you a human-readable entry next time.

....but if i had you,
that would be the only thing i'd ever need `

...i won't move in if it is not for real `

2010-10-04T14:29:00.003+08:00

Say, if ever i wanted to move into a relationship,
that will never be easy for me, i guess.

Consider that i am such a ~~lazy~~ BUSY person,
you just can't expect me to reply your every single message, don't you?
Even though i used to do that,
but i think i am quite over with it now.

Besides, reporting myself for every now and then,
i suppose that is quite annoying or irritating for some time.

Although that could be kind of sweet in some sense,
and i don't really or actually mind of doing so.
But still i prefer to have some spaces for myself.

...like no one like to be watched all the time, right? `

...i'm not in it to win it, i'm in it for you `

Despite i am an IT student or whatever you called it,
but if i would have a choice i prefer to have some real-time outing,
rather than some digital meeting, like Facebook, MSN, Skype or so.

Perhaps it is good to follow the steps of Facebook's Founder,
who setup an agreement for his relationship.

Every week there must be at least one day with 100 minutes of date.

And of course that dating can not be on Facebook or MSN, etc.

Personally i think this idea is not quite the bad.
But just the term "agreement" make it sounds more like,
i am fulfilling my duty rather than something else that suppose to be.

Whatever it is, or so it makes you think of.
i bet none a single couple would wants to,
see their partner over the monitor screen.

When people now living so close with each other,
is it really that impossible to spare maybe 2 or 3 hour,
when you have 168 hours in a week?

i don't know what others think nor i intend to know,
but when it is for you i am talking about,

...i could care less about anything like you will never believe `

Though, maybe you did really never believed in it...

...you can move in, i won't ask where you've been,
'cause everybody has a past...

...battery remaining : - - -% `

2010-09-30T20:11:00.007+08:00

Battery Remaining: 26%

i really could have a lot to say,
but i just have to make it short for now.

You must be wondering why the starting of today,
i am saying something like "Battery Remaining...".

Actually the adapter got spoiled today,
which mean i can't be charging my lappy now.
Perhaps after this post,
you won't seeing me online for week(s), i suppose.

Sad yet, there is anything i can do now.
During the class break just now,
i'd drove to The Mines and Jusco@Cheras Selatan.

i thought that maybe i can get a replacement,
from the Sony Centre there.
But i got nothing in the end,
they don't have spare adapter for sell, what a joke!

Wasted my lunch break going all the places for nothing.
All that i can do was make a booking,
and wait for like week(s) until the stock arrived. Battery Remaining: 21%

You know, i really have no idea if i would survive for next week.
Or maybe just after this weekend,
you might found me killed by boredom-ness already.

...the dying battery `
Come again, i actually have something else to blog about.
But thing like this happened all of a sudden,
i just don't think it is a good time to talk about it now.

Say, i think this is the first time,
i seriously felt that the electricity is so important.
No wonder the people from Stone Age was all dead =x

Battery Remaining: 13%

Looking at the battery sign now,
i feel soooo.... something i do not know how to explain.

Hopefully my sis would brings back the adapter from the old VAIO,
but whether it is usable or not, that would be another issue.

Until i get the battery to start running again,

...i think, this is goodbye now `

...i don't know if i should love this time table or not `

2010-09-27T15:12:00.003+08:00

...that's our precious planet Earth `
Pretty wasn't it?

And that day i went on a trip with the NASA crews.
They said i can have a picture if i want to,
so i took this one back with me.

It is really so pretty like, like... ...DREAM ON !

Okayy. stop fooling around.
That is actually just a postcard from my sis,
and with some 3D effect on it, that's it.

...how can you not love it? `

"It was so pretty, so real like i can actually touch it! ", said aidi.

Personally i think it might be beyond 3D already,
like she said this could be a 4D for it, you know.

i know the picture itself might not make you believe us.

But wait til you see the real thing,
you will know that i am not lying here. -stared into your eyes-

So, what makes me blog for today?

Maybe because i started my new semester today?
And after the first class on ~~8.45am~~, or perhaps 9.15am to be exact.
Like you know, i am just going to be late anyway...

Then i got my 6 hours break to rot about which is happening now? -.-

LOL! But either way i think i'd blamed too much,
about having the morning classes 4 times a week.

Though when i seriously get on to it,
i feel so lucky that i can actually feel the morning breeze.

...arrrr! just how ironic i can be? ` -dumb dumb-

Anyway maybe i should stop here for now,
i can use some nap before my next class started.

...i realize the screaming pain,
hearing loud in my brain...

...but i am going straight ahead with the scar `

...it is sleepy yet i'm lovin' it `

2010-09-23T07:28:00.006+08:00

Morning, dood!

Believe it or not but i am here for the second day,
and not to mention that it is still morning!

...the great coffee that starts your day! `
Though, i wonder how long i can keep this up,
like it is only the second day but i am so freaky sleepy already.
Quite amazed by myself that i went school ~~5 times a week before~~.
*Okay! or maybe it is only 3 times a week. LOL!

Perhaps i will just keep this up for 1 more day, i guess.
New semester coming up on...err...4 days later anyway.

Say, just where did McDonald find all its songs actually?
There is one song i heard yesterday,
quite interesting and nice it was.

But when i get back to my concious from listening to it,
realise i should have track the song ID,
the play was ended ._.

You know, i just let a good song slipped away from me again.
All that i can recall now is just part of its lyric,
that sounds something like this.

"...i have got a crush on you, but you didn't need to know..."

You bet, and i have been google-ing it up til now,
but not a single result is what that i am looking for. -sigh-

By the way, talking about song i just remember that,
Namewee got his new album coming out,
while the one "I Am Who I Am" is seriously nice!

No doubt that i have to admit,
he just got talent in music like not everyone can be.
But also that is why i just love his music more than he sing,
unless he could found a better lyric writer, that's it.

- - - Pause for 10 minutes - - -

Okayy. now that i've running out of inspiration of what to write.

It starts getting cold here anyway,
like you know how i unlike the cold.

i am thinking maybe i should leave now,
but maybe i will just sit for more while.
Though, i gonna be stop writing and have some of my hot coffee again.

Catch up with me on next time then ` :D

...But somehow it seems,
the harder i try to do that...

...the more it backfires on me `

...if i would leave. please do not look for me `

2010-09-21T20:39:00.011+08:00

"...one way to settle down,
is to walk around..."

You know, i kind of like the nomadic lifestyle now,
like i don't have to give a damn about thing,
"Hey, did i bathe today?"

i mean all that i have to care about,
is all what the situation allowed.
(It is not that i don't like to bath anyway!)

But i know one day i will live that way,
like when i started my Project 366 or perhaps 731. -imagining-
Seems that i have such a big dream ahead. (Hahaha... ...)

...if i would leave. don't look for me `
But first thing first,
i have to finish my Degree here.
Then get into some awesome company, perhaps Google Malaysia?
(but i don't even know where is it... -.-)

Works and farm til i have quite an amount of money,
then i will start off with my Whatsoever Restaurant.

Again, til like the business is getting steady,
i will pass it to someone trustworthy, temporary...
and finally i will be on my journey!

Oops. but before that i will buy myself a DSLR camera first.
Brands or models i am not sure yet,
but i was thinking about Nikon or Cannon.
(Though, personally i prefer Nikon i guess.)

By the way, i am giving myself only 10 years time for this.
Short enough? but i know i will make it real!

Afterall, it is chou` you are talking about, you know? :D

...just give me some air, will ya? `

You see, i am so sure about what i want later.
But, i never know what i want now... (ironic isn't it?)

The uncertainties of future and now,
interesting yet, it drives me crazy sometime.

There is one question i have been wondering ever since,
and i know this is not the time to ask about, but...

...how will you possible be part of my future? `

All that i had said,
i will give it a pause for now.

But i really don't know,
for how long i can hold down the PAUSE button...

Or neither do i know,
for how long i should keep it pressed...

Damnit! what am i thinking again?!

...walking on the street and i lost in thought, sometime `
Say, i am actually live quite a nomad already.
Like most my day i have it spend outside,
just stop whenever, wherever when i want to.

Though, i still have a home to back to,
and i still have to bath when i am home...
(okayy. it is really not that i do not bath!)

Whatever. i think i'd typed a little too much for today.

we shall meet next time, i suppose `

qu'est-ce que le courage...?

...pleurer pour vous prier de m'aimer,
ou pleurer pour vous permettre de laisser? `

...the Nightz For Drinkers! `

2010-09-16T18:22:00.002+08:00

Don't you just miss me?
i think i have been slack off my blog for some time.
Sorry about that,
but there is so much happenings lately.

Like for the Daren's Invasion,
we went Sunway Pyramid and Sunway Lagoon the second day.
But the detail i shall skip,
because it is like so much details for the detail.

...probably you don't like to read a long post, right? `

...just have fun `
Then soon later, we had our Drinkers's Nightz on Tuesday.
Sri Petaling Hotel we chose,
and it is not bad for a 3 stars hotel.

Dinner that day was settled at the Night Market.
It was crowded with people and food,
also i met friend, friends and friend's friend there.
(just say i met alot of knowing-people there...)

But here is an important note for you,
if you going to drink, alot,
make sure you don't eat too much before it.

'cause you know what?
i felt so puked that whole night,
and i did puked right after i took the Fisherman's Sweet.
Seriously lost my ability to eat for 2 days -_-

Though, i had fun, really.
Only the bad thing was i don't feel drunk, at all.
i think the puked feel cover it all. Damn! =.=

...i am going to find the link `
Say, i would really like to include some pictures.
But they are not uploaded yet,
so maybe i will just share an addition link later, okayz?

Perhaps that's all for today, movie on the run! :D

...avion, étoile filante...ils ne sont jamais les mêmes `

...哭久了会累也只是别人的以为 `

2010-09-13T10:18:00.001+08:00

"...哭久了会累，
也只是别人的以为..."

那天我把过去回忆但那爱过的感觉依然还在

是开心？因为那是曾经爱过...
是伤心？因为那是已经爱过...

彻底放下海市蜃楼

我能做的也只有不被回忆找上

...离不开上了锁的爱 `

而那个梦又有着什么预示

奇怪的梦，眼泪不是我的开心不是真的...？

...我还是看不清靠得越是接近视线越是模糊 `

...it is just me, pinkie and shawie `

2010-09-07T20:03:00.002+08:00

Here i am again.

But i wasn't quite please for today,
so won't you mind give me a minute?

-take a deep breath-

Okayz. thanks for not asking me what happened,
like it is actually no big deal anyway, just i don't like it.

...the sunset from OldTown `
Say, ShinChan vol.50 is finally out!
Can you imagine it actually sold out on the first week? -.-
Waited like 2 weeks only i got the book...

i don't remember that ever happened before,
perhaps when someone is gone only people will then appreciate him?
If that is true, maybe i should plan for my disappearance for sometime.

Whatever. this is still the works of Yoshito Usui (ShinChan Origin Author).
But next time onward it is gonna be someone else drawing it,
so can i assume it will be a brand new ShinChan on next month?

Well... i do not know.
But it is the fact i am gonna miss him.

...and my dinner partner for today `
You know what, i just realise i am not the only one,
who actually spend like 2-3 hours writing for one post. -smile-

Surprise about that? but i wonder if that is normal.
Maybe i did spend too much time looking for pictures, not?

Like i was easily get carried away when looking at pretty thing,
then i forgot i was actually halfway blogging there ._.

And finding a suitable picture is not easy, though.

Nah. whatever. it is no point telling if you're not a blogger,
and even if you're then it is need not telling.

i am gonna call it an end for this one.
And, i hope i didn't bored you like i am boring myself.

...if one thing does not kill me,
it only makes me stronger...

...but, i think i'd enough of it `

...is that necessary? `

2010-09-03T17:32:00.005+08:00

For living in Malaysia,
there are things i hate and i like.

For instance, i like the multi-culture environment here.
Don't you think it is cool for that?
Like you do not see all the same kind of human everyday.

Okayz. or maybe it is just me but...whatever.

Though, things always like a double-edged sword.
Due to the multi-culture here,
things seem to turn ugly sometime.
Like, some people start being racist.

i hate it. i really REALLY HATE IT !
Why could not people TALKED things out peacefully?!
Is That FIGHTING, KILLING Really The HUMAN NATURE?!!

Because of a speech from some people,
like we don't even know if it is real,
then the Flame-of-Anger can be started everywhere...

i just want to ask, "Is that necessary? "

...for the peace of all `
i am not saying we should ignore the matters.

But if you do feel angry about it,
why not you think of a solution to stop this nonsense?
So you won't be feeling the same way anymore.

Like i am saying something so impossible again,
it is the human nature afterall... -smiled in vain-

i do not know what got me into this all in a sudden,
but i do hope people can be more diplomatic, even just a little.

If seriously shouting or spitting can solve the problem,
i would have shouted til my voice gone off.
But unfortunately that won't help at all.

...looking for a better tomorrow `
So can we stop the meaningless damage now?

Is it really that hard to live in harmony with each other?
Don't tell me there is different between you and them.
At least for what i see, you are all from the Earth. -look up to the sky-

...please. have you forgotten why we learn to speak in the first place? `
...i just can't see myself...
...from the reflection of you eyes...

...so where am i? `

...complicated enough for one to die `

2010-09-01T00:53:00.004+08:00

Now that you mention it,
i think i did ~~seem to~~ have some rather complicated relationship.

Complicate enough for one to die from it, i guess.

But i just can't help it.
Like so naturally i like to flirt,
and that eventually got me into situation like this. ._.

Please not worry about it, though.
There will be only one and i will always know,
whom i shall love with my whole...when the time comes.

Despite how i seem to be,
i guess i am just much of a Play-edBoy ~~instead of a PlayBoy~~,
if you ever got what i mean, that's it. -laugh in vain-

Okayz. i told myself to stop that for now,
so i am not going to think more, talk more about it.

Also, i just do not feel like revealing much of the complicated part here.
Maybe i will tell if you asked,
but it is long-story-alert here, i warn you.

Whatsoever. why not we give it an end for this topic now?

...the no-face sure caught my eyes `
Say, i am always a Ghibli-lover here.
But it is just so terrible of me for being a fan.
Like, not just that i can't actually pronouce his name right,
but i even thought he is a SHE before -.- -dood!-

Anyway i just finished the "Spirited Away" again.
It is a good film than i can't explain how nice it is with words.
Like seriously i was keep thinking for the words,
but...i couldn't.

Opps! By the way did i mentioned,
i just got -The Great Collection - Studio Ghibli.Part 2- ?

And there are like 7 more movies to go from it,
those are... ...nevermind.

At last i won't be spending my time for something meaningless. -smiled-

...one should really watch it `

"i could use a dream or a genie or a wish,
to go back to a place much simpler than this."

...Happy Independence Day for Malaysia, the 53th year `

2010-08-31T05:31:00.001+08:00

Before i start bragging about anything,
let us shout it together...

...Happy Independence Day for Malaysia, for the 53th year! `

...sorry for being colorless, but i am not good with color `

i know you are so going to ask me,
"Where have you been for the Merdeka's Eve?"

Actually no where, just The Opera with chelle and her dad.
Before that i didn't plan on going out anyway,
like i feel so lazy to step outside and going so far.

But on request of wifey,
i think i will just never win a single fight against her.
(That doesn't mean i don't like to hang out with her, though.)

If you would already know,
The Opera is somewhere, a clubbing place.

And, we didn't go there for club.
like how possible can you do clubbing when the parent is there? -.-
But thanks to her dad i got my drinks for free again.

Anyway i didn't drink much for tonight,
as you know i don't drink if i drive.

Perhaps i have some exception for today,
but still i don't drive before i can see a straight line,
that is rule number 2 that shall never be bend.

So...maybe just a snip of it will do for the night :)

Then after her dad was going home,
we went somewhere else for...some refreshment, i would say.
But that part of story maybe i am not going to mention.

Anyway i still have to say thanks to Sharon here, for she would know :D

Say, i am not going to comment much on relationship matters.
Like no one can actually change your mind except yourself anyway.
Regardless what others said you are still on it, right?

(Man...i really should not brought this up like i am talking myself again.)

Oh well...
whatever it sounds like, or however i seem to be,

...you should know, i respect LOVE more than anyone do `
And that's it for this topic, for now.

...i will just follow it `

Again, i think i do look villain for stranger somehow.
Like i got stopped again by the Police Block last night -.-

But it is cool i didn't get caught for speeding this time,
just some regular check and i am off.
Though, that left me a question,

..."do i really look EVIL to you?" `

...why not we die a little? `

2010-08-27T20:43:00.003+08:00

It is 27th August today,
and it is going to be 31st August in 4 days time.
Hey! It is Malaysia's National Day, you know?! - Merdeka! -

Okayz. now please stop acting,
i know i am not really in that mood :x

To be honest, i really don't feel anything like merdeka is near.
No airplanes, no helicopters on the sky...
No flags, no advertisements on the street...

...can someone seriously tell me i am having Merdeka soon? `

(Whatever.
i think we will find out in 4 days time later...)

Say, i tend to like putting my hand into the dog's mouth lately,
do not ask me why as myself don't know why either.
But i think it's gonna be okay,
since my dog not going to bite me...i hope.

Just bear with it that i tend to be crazy once in a while.

But like we only live once, you know?
So what's stopping you from trying something new?
What stop you from experience something un-experienced? -smiled-

And one thing for sure,
i am looking forward for the Drinker's Nightz!

It is not like i love to be drunked, though.
Or maybe i am but...whatever.
i think i am seriously bored here,
so i just need some entertainment like so badly :x

...what's the point of being alive, if you do not die a little? ` :)

...the spinning fifty cents `
Anyway one long post is more than enough, so i will just stop here today.
And my readers do need some break from reading, don't you?

ps. ...i just have no intention to deal with him `

要放手就趁早
不然痛久了会麻木
忘记当初为何说放手

...thought too much again. damn `

2010-08-24T21:39:00.001+08:00

Do you know? Would you know? Will you know?
i found a long hair in my car. (LOL ~)

Okayz. i believe that is awesomely random -.-

Say, i read the sentence for some time ago,
and the same thing appeared again today.

i still find it to be meaningful,
but again, the same question i had that time still remains.

...some little daisies do `

Some people once said that,

...there is nothing you can't let go `

Even if that is LOVE we are talking about,
you will let go eventually...when it starts to hurt.

Just like you are holding a cup,
and you fill it with hot water.

Til the cup is full, the water's flowing out..
It is going to burn your hand,
you will let go so instinctly,
when you start feel the pain, getting hurts.

The theory is so simple enough,
like everyone can understand.

But...you know what?

For everytime i read that,
i feel like asking the person who wrote it,

...how possible can you let go, if the cup would be so precious for you? `

Let's say if the cup worth something like $77,777 bucks each,
are you going to let go and just let it falls and break?
Oh wait. that sounds so materialist which is so wrong.

Okayz. how about this...

Say, if the cup is so meaningful for you,
perhaps it means some memories that can't be replaced.
Will you just let go and watch it breaks into pieces?
Just because it makes you hurt a little?

...can you just cut it off? `

Whatsoever. the answer could be so subject-able,
depends on how one self look into it.

...like for me, myself. i just can never found an answer for that `

Sorry if my said broke your fantasy again.

i do hope for some times,
i can think simple like everyone does,
see things the way like everyone would see.
(please believe me, i really do.)

But again as always, on second thought...
If i would be so much just like what others do,
then i would not be me anymore.

And i just can't accept the fact, chou` no more.

SEE?! i am being sarcastic here again. (damn it!)

i feel that i always get myself in between of thoughts,
i really hate it but i just can't help it.

Maybe if that is one i can blame about,
it will be myself, for always thinking too much.

...do remember to smile, though `
Whatsoever again. there is always good and bad about things.
And i am tired and lazy to continue here already,
let's just finished my OldTown Toast and went home :)

ps. ...accidently wrote a VERY LONG post again ` ._.

...the long waited dinner. Thanks! ` :)

2010-08-23T23:47:00.002+08:00

Okayz. let's see what we got here.

...the girl who played SA `
After the movie with MunChun and some others yesterday,
i'd my dinner with chelle at StarVillage.

Say, if you are going to escape from home,
what would you bring? Maybe money? Shirts? Food?
But you know what, it is gonna be lappy for us.
(LOL! How lifeless we are -.-)

Though, lately i have been taking my Pinkie everywhere,
like i can't live without her...opps!
And there is 2 Pinkies yesterday xD

...i like the previous one more. but anyway i think she just lose ` :x

Whatsoever. i think that is enough for last night,
so how about tonight?

To be frank, for a moment there i was still thinking,
if i am doing the right thing or what.
Like you know, i never liked social activities :x

i was scared if thing would turns out to be so awkward,
or it could be so boring or topicless, whatever.

But it wasn't that bad afterall.
In fact, i am glad i have HER joined me for dinner tonight.
Like even though we never ever chatted for real,
but i feel tonight is a good night. -glad-

...and i believe this is not the only night for us `

Anyway sorry for the readers if you are wondering who she is,
i think i'd mentioned about her before in some entries, quite long ago...
And i know i am such a photo-lover here,
but sorry again i didn't took any photos today.

So, why don't you keep on wondering...
until you don't want to wonder anymore? (LOL ~)

Oh well. perhaps this shall be the end for today,
since i got nothing more to write about.

ps. ...but i just never used to have dinner with guy `

...whenever you want to say, i will listen `

2010-08-21T01:52:00.001+08:00

You know, i am not really in the mood of writing.
But something got me and i feel like sharing,
so here i am, writing for some nonsense and so...

Say, i am actually an IT student, you know?
If i am going to do something,
i should make it more IT-ish, right?

The original idea is from the internet.
But i wasn't so bad as just copying other's work,
especially when myself can do it.

...because of 'u' MyWorld is LOVED `
That was like so long since i last used a VB language,
but i am glad i still managed to remember it.

Perhaps for those who never learned that before,
you won't be able to understand it.
But i am not going to give a damn if you can read or not.

It is not like i am trying to say something with it seriously.
Or maybe i am but you will never know.

...whatever it is, just let it be for now, kayz? `

Damn it! A lot of thoughts are stucked in my head,
but i just could not get a single word comes out of it.

And there i said i am not in the mood of writing,
but maybe it is just that i don't know how could i write it.

(i really hope i could ly on a grassy-land,
beneath the starry night... listening to the mother-earth.)

Whatsoever.

Since just now i have been writing and deleting here,
like i can never find a sentence for what i wanted to say.

You might not believe it but i just spent whole hour,
trying to get these 2 sentences written.

i guess i should really call it an end here for today...

...and that day i miss U `

ps. ...but i am glad that i make you smiled ` -smiled-

...cheer you up? that's not my style `

2010-08-17T21:55:00.003+08:00

...how was your first love feel like? `
Okayz. i know i am kinda slow here,
like yesterday only i finished the [ First Love Ice Kacang ],
which actually quite a long ago movie.

...but it is better to be late than never, don't you think? `

It is seriously a nice movie i would say,
but i guess only Malaysian can actually understand, though.

Say, this kind of movie i'd never interested,
as for some so many years back there.

But now i am enjoying it,
how is it possible, huh?
Perhaps, i had changed...

Just finished my dinner in Sg. Long, OldTown,
so i think i might just blog here until the night fall.

Was out searching for dinner these few days,
but maybe you will just get bored for seeing the same face everyday.
Thus, i am having it here today with me, myself.

i know you are going to say like,
"This fella just love to OldTown everyday."

But you know what,
it is not like i love it so much,
but just i am so lazy to make a choice out of so many choices.

i am just having so much difficulty,
trying to make my choice for what or where to eat.
But when in the OldTown,
i know what i want on the moment i sit.

So why make myself go into trouble for thinking what to eat? =X

(By the way, i think that is a sickness,
for that i am always having a hard time
when it comes to multiple choices.)

...what do you see from me? `

Say, i have been practising my Basketball Toss in arcade.
i am so much done with the Daytona,
so might as well just moved to something else now.
And i am glad that i am improving from week to week...

1st Week: 79 points
2nd Week: 118 points
3rd Week: 139 points

Not bad, huh?
But compare with the real-pros i still have a long way to go.

And my hand always can't keep up on the late 2nd stage.
Seriously i need more exercises,
but that is like so hard when you have no partner for it.

Oh well. i believe this is quite a long post already,
why don't we call it an end here?

ps. ...for next one i shall write it at some outdoor cafe ` :)

i know you may not show it but you seem down inside,
but i am just never good in cheering people,
nor it is my style either...

whatever. i bet you know what i am trying to say here.
-like really whatever-

...and best luck for the next try, i have faith on you `

...the Huanted-July `

2010-08-14T20:11:00.004+08:00

The so-called Huanted July,
quite wonder if it is a Chinese Tradition or Buddhist?

Please do not doubt me on this,
but i do believe there are spirit creatures in our world,
like i think i would have witness or proves for their existings.
Though, it is not like i am afraid of them.

"As long neither of us try to disturb each other,
we can actually living together in peace."

That is my belief.
Opps. but i do not particularly belong to any religion,
like since... i found my own thought?

But somehow i find it so laughable,
especially during this month of July,
when i see people are getting scared of it.

Okayz. perhaps i am just always the odd one ._.

Like when i start seeing people getting worried,
i will feel calm all of a sudden.
And even worse when i saw people getting angry,
i will feel like laughing -_-

...say, do you afraid of being alone? `
Whatsoever. i just don't get it why people scare of it,
like just because you are told to be scared?
But as i am making it an entry now,
it is much like i am more concerning about it, not?

But you know what, what's getting me interested is that,
maybe i just wanted to see them in real?
(okayy. i just don't get myself sometime)

ps. ...found something interesting, as if you will google [朱元璋的鬼计] `

...the dream i dreamt last night, a nightmare...
...and it means something, like it means...

...but i could not remember anything about it now `

...how i like the black friday `

2010-08-13T21:08:00.002+08:00

The rain is falling on a day like this.
It is the creepy Black Friday again, Friday the 13th.

People says it is a misery,
but i just seem to like it somehow.
And i already explained the story of it before,
so i am not going to repeat the same thing for second time.

...the picture says it all `

Driving on the highway just now,
and the sky looks so blue... so sad.

It is not like the light is gone,
but the road seems darker today,
like some shadow is covering it.

Perhaps it is just me being so sensitive,
or it is just me being so emotional.
Looking at the rainy sky just now,
i feel there are sadness, sorrow... floating in the air.

But i like the moment when i feel,
like how i wish to keep it in a picture.

Can it be just a coincident or what,
but it always seems to be rainy during this day.

Though, please don't get me wrong,
i seriously like them both.
The rainy day and Black Friday, i mean.

And i believe that is the only reason,
that makes me actually excited for my birthday.

ps. ...i am just a little too not over you ` -laugh in vain-

...that is how we connect through a LAN `

2010-08-11T00:08:00.003+08:00

...and who said i can't draw? `

Hey. why don't you just ignore the OldTown mark,
like i do know i went there quite often.

But apparently this picture is not taken on today,
as my dinner was in Puchong,
which where quite a second home to me.
(The restaurant is something called Kimbal or Kimrbal, whatsoever...)

Say, the electricity of where i staying now is out service on noon,
so i went there slack for the whole day.
Bet the CheapJing should have thanks me for i saved his day. Lol~

Then obviously my dinner would be with him and my laopo.
Oh. and how long i didn't call that.
But she is going out pak-tor at later night,
and...and... SHE DIDN'T BRING ME! How sad... -crack!-

Oh well. but i got some other date as well,
like i am going to forgive you this time then xD

You probably would have noticed,
my drawings are always on the tissue instead of paper.

You are so gonna bear with it,
as i just simply tend to like drawing so.
Perhaps it is like i can always give an excuse,
when i fail of drawing something?

Okayz. that is so not true,
but i just can't explain why.

Anyway besides the words,
insane, mad, crazy, abnormal, misc...
i think i found a better word for myself.

...it is EXTRAORDINARY ` :D

,noɥɔ : Have you found the solution for your matter?
chou` : No. But i am moving on.

...story of the ring `

2010-08-07T12:25:00.000+08:00

...the story behind the ring `
How do you know, there is a story behind the ring...

It was said that centuries ago, happened in Italy.
This ring belonged to a girl, from some royal family.
(And i assume she would be a lovely one.) -smile-

She fell for a boy, who worked as a gardener for her during that time.
And she gifted the ring to him, hope that he will understand.

Of course the boy would understand her,
but he feel there is such a gap between them,
and the ring might just get into his way when he works.

Who know maybe that is just an excuse for him,
but he never tried to put the ring on.

Until one day, the girl had gone,
he then realised how stupid he was.

Looking at the ring again,
he wondered if this will be too late for him,
but he decided to wear it.

At first the ring seriously make him feel so uncomfortable,
and he tried to remove it for so many times.
But regardless how many times he removed it,
he tends to wear it back again.

...until one day, he never wants to take it down anymore `

You know, things might seem hard for him,
make him so afraid of even trying.
But there is something once he pick it up,
he forgot how to put it down.

Eventually he started to get used to it,
and he never wants to let it go anymore.

Day after day, after day, after day...
that is like almost a year had gone.
He still wearing the ring,
like it becomes a part of him already.

Until that day, he... ... ...

...... ...... ...... ......
...... ...... ...... ......
...... ...... ...... ......
...... ...... ...... ......

...and that is how the ring being passed down `

...there is something written on it `
The ending of the story,
sorry but i could not tell you now.

How i wonder if the ring might be cursed,
but i am not intend to find it out now.

ps. ...maybe it is just up to us to decide `

...here goes the last paper for my year-2, first sem `

2010-08-05T00:03:00.001+08:00

...is this real? `
Guess what, i think i just get serious over my study.
Like how often would you see chou` take out his paper and pen?
In my memory. almost never.

And he even using a plain paper this time.
Say, if you ever study with chou` before,
you should know how he only use the draft paper,
and like how drafted the draft paper can be...

Like the last time i see him,
taking out his notes, his pen, his paper,
something so terrified happened.

He happened to be the top scorer for his Economy paper,
even though the competitors are only his classmates.
He get like the CGPA of 3 out of 4 for his STPM,
with consider the 4 subjects he took are so freaking... something.

All these like just happened yesterday,
and i am still enjoying it.

...like one of the few greatest achievements in life `

...here goes the paper, pen and notes `
Though maybe i never look like someone who study,
but when i do get myself into the mood,
i really don't like disturbance.
Unless it is being said beforehand.

Whatsoever. what's done is done.
But maybe i should be glad about it,
like i finally feel dislike about it... - laugh in mystery -

Perhaps i should get back to my station now.
BCG Matrix, Ansoff Matrix, Value Chain, Generic Business Level Strategy...
i never get confused about it now,
but hopefully i don't on tomorrow either.

ps. ...i feel glad for someone who remember what i said ` -happy-

...birthday greeting for the augustz `

2010-08-04T00:20:00.000+08:00

i think i slapped myself a little too much lately.
i told myself for each time i think of something i should not,
i will give myself a cool slap on the face.

The much i think, the much detail i go,
the harder i am going to slap.
So ended up i feel quite numb now for my face.

...but no choice when that is the only way that works for me `

i forgot if i mentioned it before,
but i can't let myself getting too excited,
or worrying or minding over certain matter.

'cause for everytime i do,
i will have gastric problem so seriously,
like one time i ever had my blood vomited. - terrible -

That is not pain but suffering,
nothing like physical wounds can compare.

Thus, i have to stay alert for that,
like giving myself slap when i think of something.
But that doesn't mean i do not mind,
but just that...

...whatever. i don't know how to explain `

...and i can't even draw now `
Anyway finished my BFP paper today,
and there is only MAP paper left on Thursday.
For the 16 weeks of study is now all determine by this 2 hours,
like i should be revising very hard, not?

i do not know...
i feel myself so BLANK lately,
have no idea what i am trying to do or suppose to do.

Only on THAT time i feel myself most alive,
but somewhere deep down in there i know,
i should not be depending on THAT... now.

...damn. why can't i just make up my mind now?! `

Jeez. whatever that is,
i gotta find a better way to live now.
Or maybe a better reason to live now...

ps. ...happy birthday ` ♥
...once thought that i'd fix in the last piece of puzzle
...but all that was just my illusion

...call me. i will be there for you `

2010-07-31T23:58:00.003+08:00

2 days later i shall sit for my exam,
but somehow i was still so whatever about it.
Not nervous, not excited nor anything,
maybe just some feeling like finally?

But that doesn't mean i am not prepared, kay?
i am always ready for something.
Even though yet i finished all the notes of NWS,
and please not mention about MAP as well. (study, study...)

But you can't blame me.
Since after i finished my STPM,
i'd lost the attitude of how should i take on an exam.

Like nothing is much challenging than it,
and i mean it seriously.

...how do you laugh? or how do you cry? `
Say, abandon memory is not an easy task.
Trying to not to be reminded for what you'd experienced,
is so much... ...PAIN.
(suddenly Anima came into picture...)

Cipher Text:
kwbhzwfophbojhxtlfxhmwvigubohemmwlulvfqxdsivrjcud

KEY:
i would have no idea how to reach you, but i will be there. trust.

That is an encrypted text if you noticed.
Something. something i wanted to say, but i never.
i couldn't make up my mind now for something,
so i will just leave it as cipher as now.

i am not expecting anyone to figure it out,
but if you did i would say thanks for tried to understand me.
And just ignore that if you can't understand what i am talking about.

But rather than just being a key,
that is what i am trying to say as well.

You may think that i was lying but maybe i am not.
i don't care if i would know how,
but i know i will find my way to be there.

...simply because you are there calling for me ` -smile-

,noɥɔ : 5 years from now, is that still a matter?
chou` : Say, if you'd lost all your memories, have to learn everything
all over again, living without your past. Do you think that is a
problem?
,noɥɔ : Okayz. perhaps 5 years is too short for that, then how about
10 years?
chou` : That sounds better and maybe 10 years you could have use to it.
But can i ask you something?
,noɥɔ : Say it.
chou` : How many 10 years do you have? How many 10 years that
you able to lose to have things start over again? How can
you be so sure you are not going to lose your memory again?
,noɥɔ : ... ... ...thanks.

...the decision is never easy to make `

2010-07-29T22:40:00.000+08:00

Sent my desktop for checking like week ago,
finally have the message comes back saying that,
the power supply is bad, the RAM is spoiled, bla bla bla...

But i am not surprise about it,
in fact that was actually being expected.
And it is just a waste of money to fix it,
when you got almost everything spoiled but your hard disk.

So there has been some time i am thinking about it,
if i should backup my files as scenario like now happened.

You know, most the time people will ask for backup like definitely.
But... not this time. i don't want them anymore.

Of course i would still keep some important files,
like what i need for my study.
But not the memories this time.
i don't need anything that will remind me for my past.

If the memory is so precious,
it will never fade away like nothing.
What should be remembered will be remembered by me,
and if it don't then so be it.

...here is the Hawaiian Vodka i just drank `
i think i'd live long enough in my past.
But i am not trying to say how miserable my life was,
in fact there are some points of time which are enjoyable.
But maybe this shall be the time for me to walk out from it.

i don't need to be reminded again,
for people asking me why i spent my time for like meaningless?
For how come a lazy person like me,
will done something even others threaten me with dead and i will never do.

For so much so much i'd changed,
like i don't even recognize myself for some time.
But it is not like i went for surgery or whatever,
just that i seriously give my heart for it.

But there is still something unchanged until today,
like i still can't bear to say "NO" to You.
(again i have to laugh...)

Say, leaving is not really that hard,
what's hard is how you going to make that decision.

Trust me, i would still love you,
if one day you will found that you actually love me.
But in the mean time, i shall love myself more.

...and here is the Bitter Tea i shall drink now `
Unbind myself from the past and you know what,
despite how much you love a person,
human can actually like the others at same time.

But noticed that the words i use here are LOVE and LIKE,
i do hope you understand the different between them.
Like what i am trying to say is,
whoever could love a person but they would never like someone else?

...and how would you understand now who is love and who is like? `

- take a deep breath -

Like seriously there is too much i'd say for today,
but what's done is done.

Maybe i will come back on the next post,
if i feel something else to write again.

ps.
...i allow you to walk into my world,
but that doesn't mean i allow you to walk here and there ` LOL

Stranger A : Say, you are going to meet someone better than her.
chou` : Of course, i will. But you know what?
Stranger A : Huh?
chou` : It is just that i can never treat anyone better than her. -smile-

...here goes Inception and Eclipse again `

2010-07-28T22:26:00.000+08:00

Went for movies again today,
and it is cinema in MidValley another again.

Who i was watching with you ask?
i choose not to speak about it.
Then why...? Who the hell know. - grin -

So i watched Eclipse for the second time,
then Inception coming up next.
Quite a 4 hours and half long movies in combo,
one after another.

But i will learn my lesson,
for getting closer seats next time if i am watching with you.
But then again that will only apply,
if there will be a next time for us.

...that was a long movie `
i thought i'd ~~felt or better~~ realised something on today,
but i couldn't possibly sure about it for now.
Maybe i shall keep that story til some other time.

But you know what,
sometime i really could not figure myself out,
like my mind just like to play tricks with me.
Make me feel so uncomfortable, doubtful, anger, out of control...

But need not worry about me,
i will have my own way to deal with my problems.

i won't let it to interrupt my life,
even though it did happened the last time.
But i shall believe that will be the very first time,
and only time...

Say, i was talking about movies just now,
why the hell would i bring all these up, huh?
i don't know...
Maybe i was tired, i guess.

If maybe i can control my dream like Inception does,
i might choose to fall into it as well...

ps. ...the shoes are nice. of course. i bought it one weyy `

...a second there i thought i found what i want,
but the next second i start doubt about it...

...maybe it is true, i can't feel myself from you now `

...slipped and fell `

2010-07-26T15:15:00.001+08:00

Slipped and fell on the floor yesterday.
Blame the wet foot i have,
yet still jumping around the house =.=

i must have lie to you if i say it is not pain at all,
but somehow i was laughing like mad after i fell.
It is not that i felt it is funny,
but it is the pain makes me can't stop laughing.

i know that i am weird,
but i just don't know how to tear even i am in pain.
And sleeping is like a hell for me yesterday.

...though don't ya miss fall on the floor? `

...i should get going `

Thought of going APIIT in the early morning,
but i forget my alarm and thus i overslept.

Such a chilling weather for today,
don't the weather make you feel like fall in love?
Rather than some hot sun burning,
i just love this kind of weather.

And i saw the moon surround by the rainbow the other night,
that was so loved if you ask.

Oh well. sorry for the crapz.
i think it is yet too late for me to get going,
like i need the exam dockets so badly.

Bless that my car don't get clamped,
as i am gonna park temporary, so illegally in TPM later.

ps. ...auch! my back `

...eclipse. you are not going to miss it `

2010-07-25T15:13:00.001+08:00

the twillight saga : eclipse :
Watched it yesterday in MidValley cinema,
and of course it is nice.

But still, i am so going for Inception as well.
Good movie should not be missed, right? :D

...the twillight saga : eclipse : `
You know what, watching the Eclipse is kinda like,
watching a reflection of myself.

But the story is slightly different from here,
like i don't think i am as HOT as Jacob is. - laughed -
For me, my behavior, my attitude is much a vampire style,
but so sad i could not be as lucky as Edward does.

i kinda like Jacob in this episode somehow.
Those kind of feeling i can truly understand.
Like the last time i tried,
that seriously make me feel like dying. - fell in deep thought again -

Say, for you i could do whatever,
even if that means to cost my life.

But you know what,
no one from this century is going to buy this kind of saying,
though i just never learned how to lie to you.

Do you think it is true some love can last forever?
How will you trust if one said,
he/she will wait for you forever?

Maybe only the time can prove it.
And how i wish the time can prove that i was wrong,
but i know... ...

...the lovely one `
Anyway i am not going to talk about the movie here,
like if you'd watched it you would already know,
and if you don't then i don't want to spoil the fun of you.

But trust me, Eclipse is nice and worth for your time.

...i will wait for you...
...until the day your heart stop beating...

...maybe even then `

...i think it is PINK ! `

2010-07-24T15:26:00.000+08:00

You think it is gay,
i think it is PINK !

Due to some reasons and factors,
i'd now occupied my sis lappy,
and make her bought an APPLE now.

If you ever spot a guy in public,
facebooking, blogging, Dragonica-ing or studying,
with a pinky laptop with him.
Then you most likely just spotted me.

...so my phone can actually did macro `
Some issues from my dad and maybe from you as well,
saying that the pink make me look so gay-ish.

But who care what you all think,
i feel that it is so unique with pink.
Bear with me but i just tend to be different.

Being so common just aren't my style huh?
Like i may wearing jacket in the summer-day,
having McDonald in the BurgerKing,
or whatever insane-moves you may or may not think of.

Okayz. i think not much i needed to say for that,
as you would already know if you'd know me for long,
or following this blog for some times from now.

...don't try to scan me with your normal sense `

...love = infinite = eternal =? can never achieve `
And so i was trying to draw something yesterday,
but the ideas in mind do not well fit in my hand.
Perhaps the tissue isn't cool enough?
But i just love to draw on tissue instead of paper.

i still prefer the environment in SecretRecipe rather than Starbucks,
but i don't have a choice if i want a stable wifi-ed for internet.
Have been sitting here for like 3 hours for now,
but i don't plan to leave yet.

Maybe after hour later i will go Daytona again,
then meeting aidi and soon reach for LiYin.
Whatsoever. i think that is all for today.

ps. ...i will buy you mocha frapp next time so don't dislike me `

ps. ps..
...the parents actually spend their time here with the children playing SDO `

...SecretRecipe FTW ! `

2010-07-20T20:32:00.004+08:00

What you know, it is Tuesday again.
Ya. it is Tuesday again... - smiled -

Here i am, staying in SecretRecipe again,
having my precious Tiramisu,
waiting for the promising time.

i couldn't remember now,
since when this becomes a habit to me.

...opps! whose blog is that? `
Maybe people will never understand,
but sometime there is something need not to be understood.
Do whatever you feel like to,
it is for yourself not for others anyway.

And all of a sudden i just remember,
how i had a dream last time,
of forgotten what i should not be forgotten of this promise.

It is just so funny to think of it now. - laughed -

i am haivng some weird dream lately,
weird enough and tiresome somehow.

In the dream i am running for my life,
as i just predicted the DOOMSDAY to come.

Of course i am not alone in there,
some guys and girls are with me but i couldn't well recognize their face.
And this is the first time i'd someone,
who i never know in real to be the main-girl in my dream.

Sorry for that i always have some drama/movie like dream. - shy -
But what is the dream trying to tell me?

People tends to ask me if i am telling the truth,
but you know what.
It seriously not about how much i said is true,
what's matter is how much would you believe if i said.

Say, the environment in SecretRecipe really nice.
But then it starts making me to think of alot of things,
really alot, alot of things...

Maybe deep down in my heart,
i would have the answer already.
But most the time i choose not to believe it,
i start hating myself doing so but i couldn't help.

Think no matter how insane i would be sometime,
i am still a human afterall.

...that is no way i can be beyond human anyway ` (unless i died...)

By the way if you might not know,
i got some so-called poor memory here.

Seriously i could not be remembered things well longer than 2 years.
If one day you ever saw me on the street,
please say hi to me or by any way reminds me of you.

People tends to say that i am acting cool,
but the fact is i seriously could not remember you.
Sorry for that you're being so common for me to recognize.
(Oh well. i might be joking for this.)

Though why i am calling it so-called poor memory,
'cause on those you-know-who and you-not-know-who,
i somehow remember so clearly on every single details of them.

And... whatever.
You already know i could not forget... ... ...

...even the best moment will end. nothing last forever `
Like nothing last forever,
deep down in our heart we know about it.

i do have a choice to choose to believe it or not,
but should i really... maybe... ...?

Honestly i can not get myself an answer for that now,
as i know and i believe, miracles happen.
Just something you might possible not know,
miracle happens only when both of us believe.

Which also explained why,
i am so hard to make a decision now.
Til i have the final answer for myself,
i am going to follow my heart to do whatever i feel like to.

And walking on the street alone today,
i feel some sort of freedom that i was longing.
Though i could not ignore the fact it comes with loneliness,
but still it was not that bad, i guess...

ps. ...i got an idea for some drawing again `

...drinkers on Genting ` =D

2010-07-17T23:13:00.002+08:00

...the fantastic back `
Awesome! That is what i call,
...A BREAK FROM EVERYTHING~! `

Went up to Genting on the last Wednesday,
with the company of whom you can find in the album.

A lot of stories happened on there,
and i have no idea where should i start writing.
Or perhaps i should not be talking much,
but link the story to someone's blog (smart? =D)

...hey. can you see what is it? `
Anyway here is my greatest achievement of the year,
can you see what is it in the picture?

You Bet! It is the chip from Genting Casino!
A small reminder for you as my birth month is on November,
so obviously i get in illegally. Cool huh?!

But that is so noob of me when trying to change for the chip,
totally i have no idea about the procedures. Lol!
But nevermind as i got it now.

Though the Drinker's Night was not as satisfied,
like almost everyone get drunk so soon.
Maybe the liquid this time just too hard?

Whatsoever. what's surprise is,
we managed to wake up on 6.30am the next morning,
the buffet breakfast sure is something...

Then played in the Outdoor Theme Park,
and forget that we just hangover the last night.

...i bet that was fun `
Guess mostly that will be the story for it,
except for some side-story that you would not wanted to know.
Or maybe just i don't want to be reminded again... ... ...
- moved to the corner -

So today is the day, Bon Odori.
Still remember 2 years back there,
i am the one bringing everyone to the place.

That obviously was fun.
According to MunChun's said,
i'd high for like the whole month after that day.
And yeah, i guess i was.

You know what, i just don't get excited easily.
But somehow if you managed to turn me on,
i am not so easy to be turned off.

...like how i am still not use to the ground yet `

But let's get back to Bon Odori,
it sure gave me quite some fun memories back there.
But again when i think back about it now,
i found something stupid of myself again.

Why must it always a sad truth behind my happiness?
Don't you think that you'd set up enough obstacles for me?

Despite what had happened and happening,

...should i continue pursue for what i want? `
...or should i find another way to go? `

...have it your way `
ps. ...i think this is the first time i had doubt on where i should go `

...Eat-All-You-Can From PapaJohns! `

2010-07-13T22:02:00.007+08:00

How sarcastic it can be,
i just teared for the Doraemon's movies,
but not for any of the recent events that happened.
Though that is just a drop of it.

But maybe that is more than enough already,
like how possible would you see the emotion of chou` ?

Despite how terrible i feel for anything,
somehow my tear will only reacts to Doraemon.
If it is not for Doraemon,
i though i have forgotten how to cry during my growth.

You know, i quite envy those who able to cry whenever they feel like,
the feeling is so hard when you are sad but with no way to express.
Maybe i would like someone who can teach me how to cry.

And have to mention that ShinChan is so the source for my laughter,
but now he is long gone as well... - sigh -

Apparently above is another draft-post from me,
written on 12th July, 12.07AM, i suppose.

i'd tried to continue the story,
but i couldn't find back the feeling on that time.
So bear with me and i shall just leave it as it is for now.

But guess what, now i am writing in Sg. Long, OldTown,
just finished the movie Despicable Me in Mines.
Comment on the movie, it is definitely good for a laugh =)
but i think the story is not strong enough.

Oh Please~! No more pizza from now on!
My lunch today was with chelle and CheapJing,
and it is the Eat-All-You-Can we had.

If you do not know about it,
that is the promotion from PapaJohns.
During lunch time 12pm - 3pm,
pay RM 9.90 for each person and you can eat all the pizzas in there.

Like you just sitting there,
and for every minute a pizza is done,
they will serve to your plate.
And of course free flow of Pepsi for your thirst.

...i was trying my best `
You know, the pizza is so cool as it can fly to my plate.
i couldn't remember his name but it is this guy,
who keep serving me double, triple of pizzas for every single round.

Usually i would like to say,
please call me out for food.
But please! Not for pizza or bread, whatsoever.
(Quite wonder who can actually sit there for 3 hours without fail...)

...say, i could not have any more pizzas in my life! `

After the Pizza-Frenzy then i went for my presentation.
i would not say it is cool but not half bad either,
as i know i am done with it now. (finally...)

And for the night i watched the movie as mentioned,
and i yet could get over with it.

...it is so fluffy i'm gonna die ` xD

So here is a little thought of mind again.

Technically I have tried to fixing my thought.
Apparently I could not be fully accepted with what that happened,
but, partially I do and not doubt me on that.

Maybe if I do not seeing, reading nor hearing something,
I can still be possible staying in my cool.

Thanks that I just got reminded,
what I have been waiting is called Eternal.

And here is a quote from friend...

" 如果我能够离开如果我能够祝福
不是代表我看清是我证明我爱你 "

...would be my last PS Kursus `

2010-07-10T23:54:00.004+08:00

Submited my last assignment for this semester yesterday,
and it is like ..."What else can i do now?" `

Joined PS Kursus with chelle on noon,
it is not quite the bad i suppose.
In fact, i feel the fun but not at all either.

SecretRecipe for the breakfast as the lunch,
and feel like i had so much SecretRecipe for this month.
Somehow it is just a place i have to go,
when i need some peace for myself.

Sorry to say but i yet can accept and take the situation.
The free time now just make me think ever more.

It is not a good sign,
but i would not ask myself to stop thinking,
'cause i know thing will never worked in that way.

...a real forgotten is not something you have to work on it `

...how would you understand the meaning behind the words? `
Maybe it is true,
i have lost a person now.

i'd lost someone,

...who used to be there for dinner,
...who used to be there for movies,
...who used to be there for the fun,
...and who used to be there for just whatsoever `

For a second i will still be stunned,
for thinking, what should i possibly be doing now?

i have been questioning and answering myself,
but it just doesn't helped much up to now.

ps. ...coffee sounds good to me `

...原来我比想象中寂寞 `

...i just want to see you be happy `

2010-07-02T23:44:00.002+08:00

Suppose to be working on my assignments now but somehow...
i was stucked due to the lacking of software...

For the mean time, there is nothing i can do,
but wait for it to be downloaded and installed.

...maybe i can use some time to blog, i suppose `

...in despaired `
Seriously this is an HELL-LIKE-WEEK for me.
Please not mention about the recent event,
but 3 assignments due is killing me.
Wasn't able to have a good sleep until now...

Stressed, sorrow, disappointed, ~~regret~~...
and now you called that emotionless?
Maybe i am just expressionless.

(Say, i don't know if i am in my real form now.)

Somehow our after-so-much-meeting turned out to be so normal,
strangely normal... like nothing ever happened before.

Perhaps we both are ignoring,
or we did get over it so easily?

...ignorance isn't the way `
But things happened happened,
no matter how we act,
we can never removed THAT from our heart.
(and i remember i said that before for some other case.) - flash back -

As for myself i know i am not getting over it so easily,
but then the situation now just doesn't allow me to stay in despaired.
Kinda wonder what am i trying to do now for sometime,
or maybe what can/should i do?

...i do hope we can sit down and talk throught it `

i believe i am just so good on emotion control,
while i am standing in front of others.
Just what's the point of showing others your saddie-look?
What lies behind my smile you don't have to know.

Again i really don't like the feeling,
like living in the world of lies.
Some part of myself is asking me to find out the truth,
while the same time i am asked to ignore it...

Juat seriously what should i do?! - screamed -

i have been telling myself about it.
If ever i have a doubt, THINK.

"Why am i doing all these at the first place?"
"What is my desire?"

After all these years i almost forget what i want,
but i am glad it is still the same thing i am after until today.
It is simple enough for people to find it hard to believe,
but it's all depends how much would you believe if i said.

...i just want to see YOU be happy `

...ice-cream cheers `
Though it might not be able to ease my pain,
but at least it gives me a mindset of what to do.

Just again i have no idea,
if what i did can really fill the purpose...

...as if we never actually talked about it `

...a word for myself `

2010-06-27T23:03:00.000+08:00

Time seem to have pass slower lately,
i thought usually when the due date is near,
we will feel the hourglass finish faster.

Somehow it is different for this time.
i think i actually know why...

...stay in the world of ignorance `
i think i have calm down quite a bit for now,
but it is not healed yet,
as i just tried to live in the world of ignorance.

For sometime i would still feel a great pain inside my mind,
that is when i have too much of thoughts that can't get away.

So much of happenings and assignments due,
i could say it is a double-trouble.

But the will of chou` isn't weak,
he can still ~~barely~~ stand on his feet,
and thanks to those who'd tried to bring him up.

Take a look on my facebook's wall,
i think this was the first time i have almost full page of status update.

Seriously i have to do this to keep myself calm,
i need to talk to something when the pain hit me,
and somehow it turns out to be the wall...

That is such a pain when you want to talk,
but you can't reach the person you want to talk to.

Nowadays i am afraid to sleep and bath,
'cause both are the time,
when i most easily fall into the abyss of thought.
Then i will start to feel the pain again...

Please if you ever saw me stone there for some minutes or seconds,
talk to me for whatever or anything.
i just need some distraction,
before i went into something again.

Ignorance really not the best way to settle a problem,
and it is obviously not my style as well.
Maybe for now that is the only option left for me,
but i am going to face it when the time comes.

i believe now my friends would be there laughing,
as they have such a stupid friend like me.
But the same time i believe,
none of them would stand out and said that i am wrong.

i know and i understand,
there is never a right or wrong on this `

...it can't stay forever `
i will need a break once everything is over,
and that is going to be 2 weeks more, i suppose.

...i would like to feel the breath of nature again `

i will give it a PAUSE for now,
but that doesn't mean THE END `

...a letter for you `

2010-06-25T23:59:00.004+08:00

If i am going to tell you i am fine,
would you actually believe that?
If you already got the answer yourself,
then stop asking me.

But be proud,
at least your friend able to write a better sentence now.

Anyway i am not writing for myself today,
or maybe it is but not the whole.
This is actually for you...
you who will understand when you did read.

...letters for you `
You know, i suppose to tell you all this today,
but it is just hard to hold my feeling when i am looking at you.
To be frank, you really make me hate you sometime,
'cause you are always the one that make me lose my cool. - laughed -

i have no idea how much would you going to trust me,
but i know you will find out one day,
even if everyone had lied to you, there is one never.

And that is why i am not going to hide from you,
that i am really sad and quite disappointed.

(可能我真的不适合拥有希望...) - 苦笑-ing -

But you said i should have something to say as well,
and i did seriously, before you ever thought of it.
That is all going to be inside the same red box again,
as if you can feel it.

Please do not ask me if i am going to hate you,
因为就算我真的恨到想杀了你
我也会在杀你之前将自己杀死
as that is just the me you know all this time.

For if you still remember my word,
or if you don't then i am going to remind you again.

The promise i put in your phone,
is always valid unless you would removed it one day.

As it is not broken,
you know you can reach me whenever you called.
And i would care about nothingness,
i will be there as long i can find a way to be there.

(...任光晞...?)

Though i do hope you know what you are doing when the time comes.

i thought i can actually changed something if i tried,
but 一次又一次第三次 having the same thing happened.
一个人到底还可以承受多大的打击...?

But i think for the least i can prove something,
something i know all the time but just refused to believe...

Things i want will never fail to be in my hand,
even for the miracles to happen on me...
but i can never hold on the love i want `

...really when you have something, something will be lost `

And now you told me not to mind too much about it,
perhaps i could told you the same as well.

If you would never mind about it,
you won't be walking further and further, day by day.
And if you do not mind about it,
i won't be knowing things from such a way and not from you.

i would rather you told me directly,
我喜欢你但我不爱你
also i don't feel like finding it out by myself.
You know i would listen to you whenever you want to speak.

And this is not the first time by the way,
but for you, i do hope this would be the last time...

how funny that i am feeling hard when writing it,
but it is truly what i feel like writing at the moment.
and after so much happenings,
now i got to believe my feeling never went wrong.
- feeling stupid but i am there laughing at myself -

Though that is one point of time now,
i start to doubt about you.
i am sorry to say but i seriously have no idea,
if sometime you are telling the truth...

(此终都是善变的女人...)

And i am not putting the blame on you,
but if it is that neccessry for you to walk that far away from me,
you could have just told me, (and not facebook-ed me this time)
and you won't found my shadow beside you again.

base on the calculation now
i am afraid you are going to walk 100 meters away from me
on the 6th time i see you again
and i am serious for this one by the way

Lastly, it is the fact i just could not care less about you,
as if i could that will not be 5 years for now.
And if there could have pure friendship between boy and girl?
i am still wondering about it...

ps.
and you know what, that is actually one thing,
i don't know if i should remind you about.

Since that you seem to have forgotten,
so it is eventually keep as a secret with me as well.

i could have tell you if you asked,
but i hope you don't 'cause i don't want to hurt you.

For those who is 71 62 53 44 about me,
thanks for your concerns.
i won't die as if the music stay.

i know i am feeling better after tonight,
but to totally walked out from this emotional,
time is needed, i suppose.

But fear not, i will be fine.
As that is what the feeling told me about,
and it is strong.

ps. ...and now i feel like having my ring on once again `

...how should i define my feeling? `

2010-06-24T21:22:00.001+08:00

i love you
i love you
i love you
and now i don't know if i can love you

sorry but my mind can't form a proper sentence now
and i quite wonder how could i write for my assignments

i am not mad for what you think i should be
it is actually the story underneath it
but i am so not in the story telling mood now
for the least it won't be here

sometime i do wonder if whatever that is that is gift
maybe it is true when you have a gain you have to lose

my mind is rather confusing now
noticing that he will show up in great pain
tried to save me but bearly
like filling me with the fake memory

so much of questions and doubts come across
and i know i had thought too much last night by looking on my hair

what's happening is what i sensed long ago
i failed to ask myself believe it
but too i can't totally ignore what i found
i just lose my cool when i give full concern

being one that know too much is never cool
that kind of pain had felt enough

the fate just like to joke with me
keep of hope will never worked

maybe i should let him take control
but i am scare of seeing myself through his eyes

rather than some fakey memory he gave me
i like to listen to your say

please bear with me for an unreadable post
i lose the sense of
but be glad i still know what i am doing

ps. ...can i perhap stop writing? `

...if i had forgotten you `

2010-06-19T00:07:00.002+08:00

It has been long i am wondering about it.

If ever one day i have amnesia,
what is going to happen to me?

If ever i have forgotten who you are,
will you come look for me to tell me who you are?
Or perhaps you might just walk away from me,
pretend that we never knew each other?

And maybe you have tried all the ways you can,
but i can never remember about you again,
will you just give up on me?

...can we start from the beginning again? `

But you know what, if one day i did forget about everything...

please do not show up before me again...
as if nothing is going to change from now...

'cause maybe i would have lost all my memories,
but the kind of feeling will never changed.

no matter how many times amnesia going to hit me,
i believe the same feeling will comes to me,
for every time i meet you again.

Maybe after 50 years old later,
i will be sitting inside Secret Recipe.

Yet i would have remember about anything,
yet i would have remember why i need to be there,
but i know i will be there... waited for something...

You could have heard enough lies from others,
though you will never heard one from me.

...words i said do not fade like memories do `

...will you just walk away? `
"...and i wonder if i ever cross your mind,
for me it happens all the time..."

ps. ...am learning to walk slower by myself `

...a story to tell `

2010-06-17T20:08:00.003+08:00

Today i am going to let you know a story,
a funny one which is actually happening in APIIT.

It is the convenience store there i am referring to anyway.

...i will read you a story `
You know, two days ago i bought this one can of Coke,
the price was RM 1.70 back in that time.

Then few hours back there,
my friend bought this can of Mountain Dew,
and how much do you expecting him to pay?
Same price, RM 1.70 for that..? Nope.

Let me tell you, the price was RM 1.80 each.

Both are quite the same product,
but why is it the price different?
You may say it is the brand,
but isn't Coke much famous than "Do The Dew"...?

Well... well... that is not the whole story yet.
Just few minutes after that few hours,
i too went there and bought the SAME Mountain Dew.

Do you know how much i have to pay for it this time?
Its price was now raised to RM 1.90 each!

Can you imagine in just few minutes later,
the price goes on a raise again?
Seriously i am so wonder about,
what's the standard for it...?

...it reminds me of something `
The story kinda reminds me of another story,
which happened months ago.

The price for a bottle of Mountain Dew i bought,
was RM 2.50 each, which is expensive but still reasonable for me.

Though on one week later,
i bought the SAME Mountain Dew again.
The price was raised to RM 2.80 already...

So wonder if it is the owner forget the price,
or he purposely do so.
Do let me know, if you would somehow know the answer.

i think i am going to think twice,
if i am going to buy drinks from the store again `

ps. ...Curry Spaghetti comes into picture suddenly `

Maybe i really said it through my heart,
since it can't be through my mouth, not? :D

...but my feeling counts too `

2010-06-15T23:52:00.004+08:00

Guess what, i washed my car today.
i mean i WASHED my car!

Lol. actually i still find it hard to believe,
as for a lazy kid like me to wash that...
But it did happened ._.

...reading is fun `
Though i think i was quite an insane,
like washing it with my formal on.
i mean, who would wash a car by wearing formal?
i think that is only me `

Bet something must have get into me today,
i start feel like giving her a bath once i home.
You know, just when i think of something,
i like to do it right away. (if the situation allows...)

Seriously i never touch her body this tenderly,
giving her such a closer look of care before.
Now that i watching her,
only i realise how much she'd went through for me.

Just when i was driving her around,
i never think about this much like now.

Same goes for human actually.
When we are receiving helps from others,
regardless they are the friends, lover, admirers, whoever...

Have you ever tend to find out,
how much trouble had they went through just to get you happy?
Do you actually know the hard story behind their smiles?

We always said that,

"Thank. i appreciate your help.",
"Sorry for the trouble.",
"Your hard works are much appreciated.",
Bla bla bla...

All these formal speakings,
are you saying that because you really feel it that way?
Or you are just saying because you have to say that?

i think this question gonna take you some times to answer,
'cause i find it hard to answer as well.

But i think it will be the first one for me,
as if you come to think of it,
i do not say a thank when i do not feel like thanking.

Who care what you had done for me.
When i found it is unnecessary then it is unnecessary.
It is just a waste of your time,
and a waste of my time to thank you.
(That must be something seriously wrong about me...)

...i know you will always help me out `
Anyway put that aside first,
as it is not the main point i am trying to tell.

What i would like you to know is,
please show some care towards the people around you.
Try to find out what they'd actually done for you,
what they trying to hide behind their smiling face to you.

You know, in return maybe you don't have to love them, (but you can.)
but do let them know that you appreciate them.

And by the way, it is through your heart not your mouth.
Unless you are going to kiss them,
then that would be a different story.

Trust me, you will be surprised when you did what i said `

...how much you know behind my smile `
ps. ...but my feeling counts too `

生死相随是何价
此情此深有谁知

...can i stop writing? `

2010-06-12T18:43:00.003+08:00

Okayz. before i have anything started,
there is a kind of feeling,
which could be good or bad in some sense,
and i wonder if i should like it, or hate it.

But anyway i think i had decided,
that i should throw it away, for this moment...
And i know that is hard but i have to,
unless you are going to pick it back for me, but would you...? `

Whatsoever... ` *thrown*

...rain had fallen the whole night `
That was quite an up and down for yesterday,
and my emotional control is on the edge now.

So i did joined up the Maths Competition event,
but i am sorry to say, i didn't win.
There are much Maths Genius in APIIT than expected,
and too i was not well-prepared for the competition.

You may think that as an excuse,
but whatever you say, i just can't hear it now `

If i told you i was not down for it,
then i must be lying.
But looking at the winners' face,
there is no doubt, they had done more than me for the event.

...this kind of ending, i had accepted `

...through the reflection.
can i see the real i? `
Though something lighten me up,
i saw the rainbow on the highway.
Even though it is not as pretty as what i once saw before,
but i smiled for it ` - smiled -

After that i keep thinking of something,
something that is also what troubling me since some times ago.
But i told myself i should stop thinking,
and yet, i am still trying... thinking... ,you know.

Realised there is one element out there,
which can change my mood so fast, so easily.
But maybe that will never be noticed...

Maybe i should take care of my own feeling first before the others.
(...selfish? `)

But so badly i wish i could have the power,
to read throught your mind...

...can i reach you. if i run? `
ps. ...what excuses do i need in order to see you, talk with you? `

我不想再写
随手撕下这一页

原来诗跟离别
可以没有结尾

憔悴后悔等等这些

...it is tiresome for trying to save the earth `

2010-06-10T20:37:00.008+08:00

i start to feel tired,
tired of helping out the others.

i know that is not a good sign for me,
but i just can't help myself feeling so.

...is confused `
Lately i had been quite the busy during the class,
and sometime even after the class.
People just keep on calling,
asking me about this and that.

i know it happened all the time before as well,
but i just start feel that things are going out of control.

i know the upcoming events,
the Lab Test, assignment due whatever are stressing them.
That's why i am not telling them face-to-face,
...please leave me alone `

Seriously i don't mind of teaching as well,
but please give me a break when i am in a break.
i don't like to work during my personal peace of time,
i mean, who would like?

...go for a break `
Then again, when i have to explain the same thing,
again, again and again to a same person,
that truly make me fed up.

Though the worst is yet to come.
When i already told that i am not good on a certain topic,
but people still insist on my help,
then fine, i will help.

But when they took my work and show the lecturer,
then were told it is wrong,
that kind of look they give me back is just... ...

Or maybe when i am trying to explain half way,
then they start up to giving their ideas,
and maybe even trying to change mine.

If you are really so smart about it,
why you want to ask me in the first place, huh`?

i think if anyone read this,
they are going to think twice before asking me questions again.

But i could give you some tips,
do the right thing in the right time,
and i hate repeating myself.

...nothing had changed `
Anyway for those who usually seeks for my help,
i doubt they would read my blog.
So in the end i just change nothing,
for so long i wrote. *peace~ -_-V*

ps. ...拯救地球好累 `

Having some unexplainable feeling lately,
like something is missing from my life.

Time flows so slow after i home everyday,
i forgot how i spent my time before.

Miss the day i could stay in car all night long,
quit the buzzing from other,
have the music calm my soul.

...maybe we can't find it back,
but you are here looking with me `
Maybe all i need is just someone,
who could enjoys the same music with me.
Message:
It is nothing actually,
just wanted to tell you i read what you wrote,
but i do not know what i should write for you.

Lol. i know i am cute =x

...facebook-ed on the Broga's Peak ` xD

2010-06-06T22:38:00.001+08:00

"...woot! i am on top of Broga Hill! ` xD "

...on the Broga Hill `

If you possible woke up on 6am this morning,
and possibly you are checking facebook on that time too,
you might just saw my status updated.

Hey! i am not joking you know.
i updated my status on top of Broga Hill! Lol~
It is really quite surprised that i can connect facebook on there,
but you know, Maxis is just so COOL nowadays!

Though too bad it is not WiFi-ed there YET,
but i believe it will some days :D

...hey! i was on the hill `
For you information, Broga Hill locates somewhere in Semenyih.
But please don't ask me which road, which part, which whatever,
as you know, i am just senseless when it comes to direction.
So let's make thing simple, it is in Semenyih `

i not sure who comes out with this idea first,
going up Broga Hill to watch sunrise.
The idea wasn't that bad actually,
but i think the hill still need to grow taller for that.

Though if you are saying to have a star-gazing session here,
i would totally agree it is NICE! `

i have been dreaming to ly on a grassy field,
watch through the night sky,
and thinking about nothingless.
That kind of feeling is just so... fantastic `

And today i had my dream half-fulfill.
Why i am saying it is half?
Simply because the ground there is not grassy but rocky instead,
and somehow it is just too crowded with people on weekends ._.

...they are all humans `

...who have the clean-est shoes? `
Anyway for either reason you are climbing it,
there is difficulty remains.
As we are going to climb it in late night,
and it is long not dawn yet.

But that is the first time i actually feel the moonlight,
the feeling is just that you can't find it in city.

...believe me it is good if you love the night sky like me `

Needless to say much for now,
it is better you went there and experienced it yourself,
don't you think so? `` :DD

The photo gallery would be HERE and HERE,
but since it is facebook base...
so you should know why if you can't view it.

...i love this one `
ps. ...did i mentioned that you have to hike 1.7km up to the peak? `

...it is insomnia attack again `

2010-06-01T00:48:00.005+08:00

You know what, it is Insomnia Attack AGAIN `!!

...insomnia again `
Can you understand the feeling,
when you are so freaking tired,
you wanted to sleep so badly,
but you just can't?

If you think that it is the same,
as you are rushing for assignments or exams,
thus you do not have enough time to sleep.

i can seriously tell you that,
things are totally different here.

Well` unless you ever experienced it before,
otherwise you will never know.
(...though it is better for you to stay unknown about it...)

Anyway for those unlucky one,
i mean whoever had the same problem as me,
you probably would know how terrible i feel every night.

...maybe i should take the pills `
But what do you know,
this damnie-disorder actually having quite a period ~~like a girl~~.

Without a single failure,
it is going to hit me once after every few months.
i can say that it kinda got its seasons in the year ._.

But what could be worse,
the effect never lasts for just 1 or 2 days.
It is gonna be either 1 week or 2 and even 3...
Okayz. let's just say it is gonna be one month. (duh......)

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...Opps!
i just got freaked out by myself.

Anyway i will try to sleep harder now,
hopefully i won't get up and wrote another entry again.

ps. ...is this the cause of BPD? Or both are the Scorpion Disorder? `

...chapter 4. somebody to love `

2010-05-27T18:24:00.004+08:00

Sometime i would think that,
i am actually quite a predictor, you know?
(Or maybe i can really be one if ever i train o.o)

...somebody to love `
About month ago i had my MSN personal message changed.
And you see, i don't usually change that.

...chapter 4. somebody to love `

i wrote that for the message,
without any particulor reason beside i feel to do so.

Though soon after it changed,
i start realised that people around me are getting paired up,
one after another...

And even some of them are not,
yet they are working on it,
or someone else is working on them.
i believe you know what i am trying to say :)

Is this really just a coincidence?
Or maybe i did able to feel the love in the air?
Or.. or... i just spread the love into the air?! LOL ~
(i seriously doubt it would be the third one anyway...)

Again this is not the first time for it to happen.
If possible i would like to show you some cases too.

Though... always when i start to think of it,
i just can't think of anything =.=

Til that i can provide you with something next time,
maybe we should keep this puzzle unsolved for now?

...the unsolved puzzle `
And lastly...

Don't you think comment on other's blog,
just doesn't sound cool enough?

Maybe i should leave comments on my blog,
and ask others to read instead? xD

ps. ...i thought i am telling others, or am i telling myself? `

如果沒法忘記
就不要忘記好了

...真正的忘記是不需要努力的 `

...what's in your mind? `

2010-05-22T22:34:00.002+08:00

Maybe you would not know,
or you already know.
Things. can turn out to be so much different,
whenever you are willing to.

...more than words can say `
Uncertainty and misunderstanding,
i believe both could be the worst matter to us.

Once they happened among us,
it might cause us losing faith of each other,
or might be worse it makes us losing each other...

But that is not absolute.
Thing can change,
only if we willing to share our trust with each other.

Sometime when we choose to trust,
things would seem so much better,
compare to the time,
when we choose to doubt a someone.

Perhaps you maythink that i am lying,
but why not you start testing it out?

...you might just be surprised `

...trust of each other `

There are some rumors flying around me lately,
and i actually knew it too.

Due to hatred or love, caring or troubling?
for me that does not matter at all.
i do not care about what others think about me,
but... ... ... ...nevermind.

What's matter is that,
it starts make me to doubt `

i thought i can trust you with all my will,
i even promised myself that i will,
though that is not easy.

Especially when i can never know what you are thinking.

(...what's on your mind...`?)

i started to doubt now,
even though it only happens once in a long-while,
but that still is the feeling i hate the most.

(...why doubt when you can trust? `)

i decided to write this up for my blog,
as so i can always remind myself about it.
Or maybe i am writing this up,
just so you can tell me what you're having in your mind?

But once again please asks him,
'cause he might just wants to tell you so badly `

...not just a promise. it is memories `
i could really use a wish right now,
but the airplane in the night sky can never be a shooting star `

想要对你说的不敢说的爱
会不会有人可以明白

两颗心没有祝福
但爱你并不孤独

不懂你的黑色幽默
想通却又再考倒我

...可能这只是海鸟跟鱼的故事 `

...omg. i am early for both classes! `

2010-05-19T15:44:00.004+08:00

i quite wonder what am i doing here,
or maybe why am i here too..?

Few minutes ago i decided to skip this soon-starting class,
as i just simply don't feel like attending it.
i went The Mines after my lunch just now,
original plan is to slack there for while then go home.

But then about one hour of slacking,
i suddenly feel like coming back for class.
And now you see that i am blogging in lab...
(i am even earlier for the class =.=)

This is totally strange, you know?
Imagine i am earlier for both classes today,
that is just so freaky scary ._.

...color of my world `
Anyway enough of story telling,
i should start talking of what i want to talk about.

i found that it is really a weird of me.
(Kayz. i knew that i am never un-weirdie so just pardon me.)

i always wanted to blog something,
or maybe just start up on my assignment.
Seriously i have a lot of ideas pop up always,
but that only happen when the time is after 12am.

i know i am always a midnight person,
it is never a problem to me before,
but i think that start troubling me now.

Having morning class for every single day,
that is just hard to allow myself sleep late now.
i don't mind if i sleep in class,
but i just don't feel like living "Left For Dead", you know?

Sigh. Anyway i better stop writing now,
times to do my ~~Facebook~~ works in lab, i suppose...

...chou` simple yet complicated `

2010-05-16T16:10:00.001+08:00

If you ever keep up with my blog,
i did mentioned something about that,
i have such a cooler life compare to other.

Whatever i need, i will have it.
Eventually and most likely,
it never fail me in that way.
But what could be the greatest pain of it?

This is so sad but true,
but anything i want, i will never have it.

...it is simple yet complicated `
With the 20 years living experience,
this truly is the conclusion i can make for myself.
You can doubt me on that,
though that just show that you do not understand.

Seriously i have to control myself,
never go desperately over anything,
and eventually that become a personality.

i too tried to break that rule before,
but it never goes well though =(

Perhaps, i should just stay with the style.
Maybe that is just how chou` should be.

Oh ya... ...what comes around goes around ` =)

Like the game of Monopoly,
there is Fate and Chance in our life.
It might be cool or the other way around,
whenever we come across with them.

We can not predict what's going to happen,
for each time we stepped on it.

But maybe... ...i can use a Chance now `

...such a COOL start for the day ` zzz

2010-05-12T02:51:00.004+08:00

Actually i suppose to be sleeping by now,
consider that i am having morning class for tomorrow.
(even though i was late for it ~~most the~~ every time...)

The time now is 1.46AM,
but i am still writing for my blog,
'cause i think i have a very COOL start for the day.

...the light trails `
As following HockWai's order,
we went OUG, Steven's Corner to yum-cha just now.

About 1am after i fetched LiYin home,
i went home through the Seremban Highway as usual.
And what's so COOL that i wanted to blog about,
you will find it out soon if you continue reading...

So i was on the highway around that time,
and with no expectation and prediction,
there is Police-Block on half way.

You know, in the midnight... on the highway... there is a block...
what is going to happen?
Need not saying you should know the answer.
It is just so obvious anyway.

After the scenario of the clamping,
somehow my luck wasn't all gone yet.

Seriously and honestly, believe it or not,
that is my very first stop on Police-Block.
i do feel the scene was quite funny,
as this is my very first experience on that.

But it ends well with the Rules-of-Nature,
that's all you need to know from here, i guess.
(ask me personally and i might tell you more, maybe.)

So... do you think that is a further story for it?
i think that will be quite in my wonder list too.
You know, my life is just unpredictable.

...highway in midnight `
Well` i have something else i wanted to blog about for long.
It is actually in my draft for quite some times,
but i shall post it on the other day i suppose,
since i got this now, right?

...thus, maybe we should call it a day? `

ps.
By the way i feel i am being quite silly lately.
First, i mistaken my friend birthday 1 day later,
and soon i mistaken another friend 1 day earlier...

It is not i forgot the date of their birth,
but i simply mistaken the date of the day -_______-

...做不成男女朋友，做个特别的朋友 `

2010-05-05T23:29:00.004+08:00

i do not usually do this,
obviously i do not like to do it either.

Just working on some Ctrl+C and V,
then make it as an entry for the day,
don't you feel like it is cheating in some way...?

But today i will make an exception,
'cause seriously i found this article not bad at all,
and it is quite true on some facts.
So i decided to share it.

Actually i would like to credit the originator too,
but all i know is i get it from Sharon,
and she shared it from someone else,
then i not sure if the someone else shared from someone else-else,
and the else-else from else-else-else and else-else-else-else... ...

So i can only say sorry,
if you are reading this and you are the originator of this ` =x

...until the end `
两个可能彼此相爱、喜欢的人，
但是，又不属于友情、爱情、亲情中的任何一种，
彼此不能成为男女朋友，只能做个特别的朋友……
也许是为了朋友之间的义气，不能归属。
也许是为了顾及家人的意见，不能归位。
也许是为了自己的前程，不能承诺。
也许是相遇太早，还不懂得珍惜对方。
也许是相遇太晚，彼此身边已经有了另一个人。
也许是回头太迟，对方已不再等待。
也许彼此在捉摸对方的心，而迟迟无法跨出界线……
不过即使没在一起，
彼此仍能找到塌实的感觉，
仍然会保持不隶属任何一种感情的关系。
但是彼此心底清楚，
对这个人，你比朋友还多了一份关心。
因为有了彼此，心里总是被幸福塞的满满的……
即使不能彼此名正言顺的牵着手逛街，
还是可以做无所不谈的朋友。
彼此有喜欢的人，口头上会说不吃醋，
心里却会觉得胃疼……
对方遇到困难时，
会尽全力伸出援助之手，
不会计较谁又欠了谁。
对方生病了，
会缴尽脑汁找药方，
恨不得变成护士，陪伴在身旁……
每个人这辈子，
心中都有过这幺一个特别的朋友，
很矛盾的行为。
一开始可能不甘心只做朋友的，
但久了，突然发现这样最好。
宁愿这样关心对方的心情，
总好过彼此生活在一起受伤害……
做不成男女朋友，
当个特别的朋友，
有什么不好呢？
你心中的这个特别的朋友...? 是谁呢
很多的感情，
都败在了现实的面前……
友情可以演变成为爱情，
爱情最终进化成为亲情，
彼此就将友情直接进步到亲情……
人生不过百年……
能牵手的时候，请别只是肩并肩，
能拥抱的时候，请别只是手牵手，
能在一起的时候，请别轻易分开，
能成为红颜知己，请别刻意离开！
珍惜彼此之间塌实的感觉

...做不成男女朋友，做个特别的朋友 `

...do not let go `

...chou` life, just amazingly different `

2010-05-03T21:20:00.001+08:00

You know, that surely is cool.
Once again i have it proved,
my life is amazingly... ... different than others.

For everytime i thought i would be,
ended up in any sort of worst situation i could be,
it turns out all fine in the end,
and you just can't explain why.

Likes it happened quite alot of times,
til i already used to it,
and forgotten what examples i can give you.

Maybe like what happened on my SPM?
Or how did i managed to avoid all the punishments,
when that was quite some years back there...?

Anyway i think i have one very recently to show you.

You do know i got clamped and fined that day, right?
i thought the story ends like it seems,
and i was just in some luck, that's it.
But actually, it is not.

Even if i give you hundred chances to guess,
you will never guessed what's coming next.

...wonder wheel, you might just wonder forever `
i gave the receipt to my mum that night,
thought to just asks back some money for it.

But guess what? Fews days later she told me,
she bought the serial numbers on that receipt,
and she WON THE GRAND PRIZE with it!
(W H A T ?!)

Seriously i am not kidding.
Even myself having a hard time to believe it.
But it did happened.

As so i had some more money again as "reward?" =.=
And another few more money,
to buy the TPM monthly parking.

...will you ever imagine thing like this happens? `

...why it always rains on me? `
Sometimes i really have no idea,
if i am having a fantastic life here?
Or the other way around...?

Whatever i need, i will have it.
And what could be better?
That is i don't even have to spend much afford for it,
they will come to me eventually.

It is like i just doing what i feel like to,
and i will get things i need to have.

Sounds cool, huh?
But that is one bad side of it,
one SERIOUSLY BAD of it.

But when you get to have anything you need when you need,
how bad could it get to you?

Interested to find out?
Maybe i will let you know the other time,
'cause i feel like stopping,
right here, right now ` :)

...awesome. car clamped for the first time `

2010-04-29T00:01:00.002+08:00

As me, myself is so refuse,
to make double posting on one particular day.
Thus, i write this as a 29th entry,
but all the happenings were actually on 28th instead.

So readers, please keep that in mind ` :D

Today i am not going to talk about any inner-thoughts.
i know i am going to bore my readers,
if i keep thing and things going with that.
So i will be giving you my cool experience of the day.

Say, that is definitely a cool day, you know?
Guess what? For the first time i got my car clamped! (R A W R ~)

Just everytime when i walk back to my car after class,
seeing all the other cars who got clamp,
i always pray that, please don't be my car...

But the same time also i quite curious,
what is the feeling when you saw your car got clamped?
So today i get to experience it...

The moment when i saw my car,
i immediately got the feeling of, "What The HELL `?!"

But i know i got no one to blame,
'cause i am the one who did the cheating first,
just it is not easy to get over with on that moment.
But fine... atleast i got discount of RM10 ._.

...the judgement `
So i keep thinking today was Hock Wai's birthday,
but it was actually yesterday.
i even wrote it on my schedule,
but still i get confused somehow.

So i went over to Net Studio after class,
thought to at least give him a birthday wish or whatever.
That time he keep told me it suppose to pass already,
but i thought he is just kidding, bla bla bla...

But hey, wait a minute.
It is 28th today, not the hell of 27th?! (R O F L ~)

Too bad i start realised that only when we're leaving...

Ahhhhh. Whatsoever!
i know he won't mind it,
in fact he can't mind it either =.=

i have no idea why i am being such a silly all this sudden,
then having such a luck to be able to laugh on my car... zzz

...maybe i just need some rest `

...chou` going throught a devolution `

2010-04-28T01:17:00.002+08:00

i think chou` has found his answers for something,
but yet for everything.

...find the way back `
Maybe he is wrong?
Ya. maybe he is...

He got lost in the road,
where there is nothing right, or nothing left `

i should have walked back,
to find the chou` that is lost.
i think everybody would likes the old chou` more,
or for the least, i love him.

The chou` who do according to his likes,
who hate what he hate,
and who love what he love.

...whatever, whenever, wherever, whoever, whatsoever `

Ya. right.
The chou` who don't like to question and explain.

He believes whatever his feeling tells him.
He thinks people would understand if they understand.
He do not needs the right and wrong from others.
He needs only trust.

and he know he is wrong for the first time,
a seriously wrong...
~~and maybe a second time too~~...

But sometime he just hope you can ask him,
'cause he would likes to tell you so badly `

ps. ...consider the time now, i know i will be late for class tomorrow `

...chou` can not make up his mind `

2010-04-24T20:54:00.006+08:00

...can you guess where is it? `

A great breakfast for a great start.
That's what claims by the MacDonald,
but truly it is great :D

i had my breakfast in there,
early in the morning like 6am something.
Having it alone but i don't feel bad at all,
i like the environment there as well the music played.

After the great breakfast,
i started my great day with... ...... ......

Damn. i just can not continue the story now.
Seriously not in the mood to write.

Having quite some thoughts turning in chou` head,
chou` feel like he is not being himself for the moment,
and this time he can't seem to be able to make up his mind...

He would like to share if possible,
but not here, not now...

When he able to get clear everything,
he might just let you know then...

ps. ...i feel i should say sorry `

...the night we drunk `

2010-04-19T23:25:00.002+08:00

It is kinda feel like,
this is gonna be a weekly blog right now.

Not that i am trying to find excuses for myself,
but 24 hours a day is simply not enough.
Whatsoever, please do check back once in a while,
as i am still updating it from time to time.

Say, that was a wonderful night for us,
the Alcoholic Nightz of last Friday.

We drank overnight at LiYin's place,
since her parents weren't home.
And obviously most of us drunk,
but some of us kinda lose to the sleepy-ness ._.

Whisky, Brandy, Rum, Vodka i chose for the night,
hoping they would possible get me drunk.
But damn, they couldn't.

i was feeling unbalance at the end,
and of course sleepy, but yet drunk.
Though that was quite a not bad experience, i suppose.

...i am looking forward to have another round or rounds ` :D

...living in the darkness `
Got the morning call from aidi on the next morning,
as we promised to have breakfast together.

But i was kinda in the lagging-mode that time,
so whatever she said or asked,
i can't actually respond to her.
That was cute if you could actually see the scenes.

Anyway i do understand what you're talking about,
trust me, i will be there when you are in need.

Though in order to get out of it,
no one can actually help you but you yourself.
The door is for you and only you can open `

...to get out of this `
Some of you might not understand what i am talking about,
but it is okay as i am not talking to you anyway.
Guess i should go for my sleep now.

the reason you can't find me before
is 'cause we never promise

but now i will be there
so whenever you come
you will find me

i promise...

...the wonderful Saturday ` Sharon's 21st xD

2010-04-13T23:13:00.002+08:00

You have my apologize if you are one of those,
who has been longing for this update.

This entry should be more or less about the last Saturday,
which i think was quite wonderful for me.

But to reduce our time consuming,
for reading and writing this entry,
i am going to make it brief here.
(Okayz, i am just being lazy again.)

For the morning we had our breakfast in SouthCity, OldTown.
The we here referring to me, myself and aidi.
As the best OldTown outlet i had tasted,
sure it didn't disappointed me, or i mean us.

Later on, i fetched her for tuition as usual,
then went for TheMines myself for some entertainment and so.

The tuition finished on 4pm,
and we went for dinner after that.
The place is somewhere in Serdang, named ___________.
As i am not good on English Translation so i will just leave it blank.

The dinner is nice and we had quite some talk there,
though the conversation is P&C so i am not going to share.
Opps. and not to forget we had the side-dish after the dinner.
(But i feel sorry for that as it might be the cause of her fever :x)

...wishes come true `
Well.. Well... After that, i had my second round at Sri Petaling.
It is the 21st Birthday Celebration of my primary friend,
also it is the very first 21st Birthday Party i attended in life.

Wonder why i am like making it sounds so serious...
Anyway if you are one of the chou`friends,
most likely you heard me mentioned about her before.

i always thought of seeing YOU again,
maybe some times when i am wondering or slacking,
near Sri Petaling or CarreFour or so so...
But ended up it is on your Birthday Party, quite unexpected.

Anyway i am looking forward to have a better talk with you ` :)

...can see that i went through the whole day `
Honestly, i can't remember well of my primary schoolmates.
The seperation of class did screwed me up for that,
so if any of you are reading this and i can't remember who you are,
please remind me about you, sorry and thanks i would say.

Seriously one hand of fingers are enough for me,
to count whoever still stay in my memory. (Oppss...)

Eh. seems like my talk run off somewhere again suddenly.
Wonder if it is good or bad,
to have multiple thoughts in one time like me.

i hate to write or text chatting,
as i always have different answers for one's question in one time.
Much prefer on face-to-face talk,
as i could say whatever cross my mind first ` :D

Kayz. put that aside.
i am moving out of topic again.
Better i should just call it an end now ._.

每当有事情无法决定时
我都对自己说
如果我的生命只剩这最后一天
我会如何选择呢

所以每次我所做的任何决定
肯定是当时最好的决定

想想要是我真的死了
我应该不会为任何事请感到后悔吧
但肯定有两件事让我感到遗憾...

...i just gave a ride to a stranger!! ` :)

2010-04-01T15:53:00.005+08:00

...i just gave a ride to a stranger!! ` :)

If you are a APIIT student,
or knowing any of them,
you should probably knew something,
about the tragedy of ~~APIIT~~ TPM parking system.

i always think about that,
how good if the students could give a ride to campus,
whenever they are leaving from the car park or something.
(For sure as if they're going to passby on their way.)

i know that may sounds stupid for some of you,
but to be honest that actually make sense too, what.

Anyway it is always easier to say than act,
someone needs to take the first move.
Thus, i just did it today. Weeeee~ xD

The story happened as...

i am going home as usual after my class.
But rather than going off straight,
i took a turn to the shuttle station.
i offered this Stranger A as if he wants a lift to APIIT.

Obviously he asked me why,
but he accepted my offer in the end.
So i fetched him there and a happy ending. LOL~

Well` the story was short,
but it was a great success.

Moreover, i felt glad as i helped someone.
The feeling was as good as,
i donated the X'mas gift to an unknown-child last year.
i think that's how you feel when you do a good deed :)

...just some reminders `
Anyway if there are any APIIT students reading this,
i sincerely hope you could do the same,
if it is not being any troublesome for you.

You will never know when you need the help,
when you are rushing for class in the future time. (Ohhh...? LOL~)

ps. ...though for the girl drivers please remember safety come first ` :D

...chelle was my classmate!! `

2010-03-30T20:10:00.003+08:00

Please click HERE for more information.

Nothing to say but just the laziness hit me again,
i am lazy to story for what actually happened yesterday,
so read from that link if you like to find it out.

It is from chelle's blog by the way ` :D

...time to study `
Say, how is it feel like having a 1-day-classmate?
Okayz, i think that was hard to imagine,
or it will not be something we would think about.

But Hey! It was awesome and fun seriously!

You know, talking about chelle,
she is always like something... or anything, whatever thing to me,
But somehow she turned into my classmate all of a sudden!

Unless i am going to repeat my Degree again and again,
else this should not be happening...
But somehow it did happened,
even though it was only one day ._.

Maybe that was like one another day of college,
but truly it was fun having you here,
and i know you're having fun too. Lol `

For your information, it is so sad,
that this new semester is rather boring,
as comparing to the previous.
Not to mention that the timetable too is rather... ._.

But anyway for whatever reason it could be,
hope i can just finish this semester peacefully `

...no one said chou` is normal `

2010-03-24T10:40:00.002+08:00

...sight in the dark `
Sorry for not doing my update,
but i suppose i just don't have the time for it.

Anyway you would have noticed by now,
as on the ending of my previous entries,
there are few sentences of chinese written.

Quite a story it is i guess.
You will find out that it is so romantic,
and rather stupid as well for the guy.
As if you could read chinese...

If say you are not in your fantastic lunatic dream,
you think someone could or would actually do the same for you?
i do not have the answer for you,
but i know a normal person will never do that.

It is so sad and bad,
but welcome to the world of reality`

...left out in the dark `
i feel kinda leftout lately.
Knowing that the "shui-yeh" had started his class,
and LiYin too found her internship.

It is like the two i thought,
to be kinda lifeless like me,
had gone busy for now. Lol`

Eventhough i knew my class would be started next week,
but yet i got my timetable for it.
Kinda hope i can have my class started now,
i must be getting weird-er for not loving holidays ._.

ps. ...did anyone told you Chou` is normal? `

...keep a healthy life style? Nah ` ._.

2010-03-15T10:06:00.003+08:00

Can't believe myself woke up so early again,
seriously quite a healthy life style if i keep this up.
(But i know i won't. Lol)

The sky on 6am in the morning was quite blue,
like it is going to rain anytime soon.
Perhaps that Monday Blue was true afterall?

...where are you `
Some of you might think i am being insane,
as you won't usually see Chou` in the early morning,
and Chou` is just so not belongs to the morning anyway.

Moreover if i told you what had i done just now,
someone might shouted, OhMyGod!!
or calling 911 for me already o.o

So why would i woke up so early in the morning?
i can only tell you that, 牛仔很忙

But later i went to Taman Bukit Jalil,
and had a jogging session by myself.
Seriously i mean it, i go for jogging in the MORNING. Lol`

i think my crazi-ness is getting serious nowadays,
even i can not predict myself,
what i am going to do next.
Perhaps i can never turn back to normal ~~again~~ ._.

...after the rain `
Feel quite satisfied after the run anyway,
but i see the crowd there was gone on weekdays.
Though i quite enjoyed the silent-ness,
as well the environment of nature :D

直到有一天你找到人来代替
不再需要我的存在

那时我才会到那爱情悬崖
为你带回你所爱的蒲公英
让他转送给你...

... ...一个蒲公英的约定 `

...had a hard time woke up today ` ._.

2010-03-13T16:36:00.000+08:00

11th of March, a day of unexpected.
Whatever there were expecting to happen on that day,
ended up with such unexpected results.

i know, fault was not from us.
Change, we do not need.
It was the others who that can not understand,
we will continue the hard works, not for others but ourselves :)

By the way, i don't know when i took this or even how,
but i just like it somehow :D

...sometime we don't need to know `
Actually i wanted to write more for today,
but have date later so got to go now.
Perhaps some other time `

我不会因为我知道这一刻你还需要
我的陪伴来弥补你的寂寞
我的安静来聆听你的烦恼
我的声音来带给你欢乐... ...

...there is time when we are more than just friend `

2010-03-11T19:27:00.000+08:00

...friend is forever `
"Friend" you say?
Erm... seriously i don't have much.

i can never be those person,
who would have hundreds, thousands of friends,
in Facebook, Twitter or Friendster whatsoever.

If you ask how many persons that i really consider as friends,
i could maybe counted with the 10 fingers of mine,
but for most case it should not be more than 20, i guess `

Surprise? But i think that's just how i enjoy my loneliness :)

Indeed, i know quite alot of people,
and probably they know me too.
But can you call that as friend as well?
When neither of you had ever experienced anything together?

Well` guess you would have the answer yourself.
Everyone would has different meaning of "Friend" anyway.

...there is time when we are more than just friend `
In my case, i could do anything for chou`friend,
though only when they are really in need.
And you may not know but i can really get angry,
when chou`friend get defamed for what they not deserved to.

i know some would doubt me on that when i say angry,
but i can tell you it is true.

Friend is means to be forever.
To me, it comes just after Promise.

Though ...i think i'd done more than just friend would do for you`

爱情悬崖传说到过那里的人都必死无疑
你说那儿长的蒲公英很美丽你很喜欢
问我会否为你去摘
我说我不会... ...

...i once chose to leave `

2010-03-10T18:01:00.001+08:00

...fallen leaf `
i do not understand,
and really can not understand.

Setup a group in Facebook then ask ANYone to join,
like this really able to recover the lost love`?
(Not to mention that i don't actually know the 2 persons...)

Maybe your love to her is seriously strong,
but that doesn't means the same for her, right?
Have you ever thought of why she wanted to leave,
before you start telling the world that you got dumped?

i am not saying that retrieving the lost one is wrong,
but i am sure there are ways out there other than Facebook.

Personally i found it rather stupid and childish,
when you ask helps from someone who don't even know you.
Setup a group and asks people to support you,
so that she will think it is wrong to dump you?

You know what? In my sense it is more like,
setup a group and collecting pity from people,
so she would know how dummy you can be.

...in the pud `
There must be a reason for her to choose to leave,
which i do not know and not interest to know.
The matter should be discuss between the 2 of you,
or perhaps anyone who might get involved.
(For the least please be someone who would know either of you.)

Say, you are a man right?
So can you at least be a man in time like this`?

If she really wanted to breakup with you,
please do something that make sense to win her back,
or you can either go emo at a corner and draw your circle.
i would still feel proud of you if you do so...

But when you start telling the world,
you got dumped and how pity you are,
you'd already failed the mission.
In fact, i think you deserved to be dumped too :)

...i chose to leave `
If anyone read this and feel that i offended you,
you're welcome to scold me or flame me.
As this is truly my own opinions on this topic,
and i will never regret for what i'd said or done :D

ps. ...i chose to leave that time, because i really love you `

...rediculously random `

2010-03-09T15:55:00.003+08:00

...candies! `
Tend to listen for some Jay's old songs,
thus have them play in my blog.

...so please tell me the songs are nice ` Lol

By the way, my sis went to Penang already.
Is it 3D/2N or 4D/3N?
i do not know, as i never asked and she never said.

But hey! There is where i planned to go in the first place, you know?
Still wonder when i can seriously step on that land ._.

Say like, the "every-one-hour" is getting seriously.
Alot of crazy ideas coming out,
and i was trying so hard to make it real.
Say, why not you join me for a trip to Kampar or Terengganu?

Oh dood` my mind was changing so fast,
which seems hard for me keep up with it.

Healthy Life Style, it is good to have but hard to keep.
Perhaps i should find one healthy person beforehand.
It is been so long that i exercise truly.

ps. ...my apologize that this entry is being rediculously random `

...why won't you just let me go? `

2010-03-06T20:49:00.004+08:00

...psst psst `
Hey! Guess what?
Just checked on APIIT WebSpace,
the results for AQM, MPP and WDD were out!
(Thanks Chun Kiat for telling.)

Since i am not taking MPP,
so i was looking for AQM and WDD only.

Even though this is just the first marking,
and the results still subject to change.
But yet i can hide my happiness,
when i knew i get 1st Grade for both xD

Applied Quantitative Methods, the maths related module.
i am not surprised with the result,
as i got the 1st Grade with 15/15 Grade Points,
which is actually in my expectation. Lol `

Wed Design and Development, just what its name means.
i was quite surprised with this one though.

Although i knew i had done so much for it,
but 1st Grade with 13/15 Grade Points...
still quite unexpected for me ` xD

Anyway let me tell you something,
i was kinda pissed by the Malaysian Studies, you know?

It supposed to end N months ago,
but yet it still troubles me until today.
Damnit! i gonna find Mr. Yip on Monday =\

...hope the world is gonna be okayz `

2010-03-03T16:44:00.004+08:00

...bring the Hope `
i know it is been quite long already,
since i last setup an entry here.
Seriously i know, even my Blogger cookies was removed. Lol`

i can't say if i was pretty busy or lazy.
Also alot had happened recently,
so i don't think i can tell everything here.
In fact, i'm just lazy to tell. *slap myself*

Like...
CNY's gathering,
belated Valentine gift exchanged,
going back my ex-school for multi-purpose,
celebration of aidi's birthday,
plans of National Zoo visiting or Langkawi trip turned down,
Earthquake in Chile and Tsunami Attack...

How you expect me to actually story each of it`..?
Not to mention that i was playing WonderKing Online lately,
which too quite addictive, i guess xD

By the way, the day after the earthquake,
there was a very strange and abnormal Thunder Storm.
The lightning strikes like never stop,
and they could barely hit the ground, you know?

That was the first time i felt scared of lightning,
as i don't even dare to get near outside.

Too the Magnetic Field is being different that time,
i could somehow feel it but please don't ask me how.
i just hope the world is gonna be okayz ` ._.

ps. ...that CheapJing abandoned me and went Singapore alone :x

...yet it give in `

2010-02-19T17:34:00.007+08:00

...yet it give in `
It is not because what you think they are, thus they are.
It is what they are, thus they are.

i should never had buried it so deep,
til it can never find its way back up.
i see its root was trying to come out now,
though will it be able to stand up for real?

i guess i was wrong at the very begining,
but is it too late to start all over again`..?

Quote of the day,
...love you not because who you are, but because who i am `

...Valentine X Chinese New Year `2010

2010-02-14T23:41:00.002+08:00

Chou` does not lie.
if Chou` had said it then that is it.

Chou` had once told himself he shall not be down.
Even if Chou` have to be sad,
too it should not last for long.

Chou` is asking himself to smile now,
though he still need some time.

But for the least, Chou` had let himself not feeling blue now ` :)

17 minutes more and Valentine`2010 ended officially,
Though Chinese New Year (CNY) was still going on.

Personally i do not like CNY.
i used to love it,
but now i am not.

Nothing much good happened lately,
though what is uncool happened quite frequently.
Some i had mentioned in previous entries and some did not,
but i think that doesn't matter anymore.

Actually what i want is just some appreciation.
It is so simple and easy,
but still alot fail to give.

What actually make me smile these days,
i think was the coffee shop's GorGor. (or uncle?)
Sounds so gay for me to call him GorGor now ._.
Anyway it happened on the New Year Eve...

That day i visit, he suppose to close and cleaning there,
then the others told me there is no more serving already.
So i am about to leave, but he asked me to stay,
as he will make the last one specially for me.

As i see there is no more hot water left.
But he actually get it from his house and cook for me.
Moreover, he said he is going to treat me this time.

You know, that is what seriously make me smile.
i love this kind of feeling,
when someone specially done something for me.

Well`... actually i think i have more to say,
but i don't know how to write it out.
Hope i can find the tree hole some day.
Did you talked to a dog before`?

ps. ...do you know what word i hate the most? `

...the unfinished entry and i was down `

2010-02-11T01:03:00.001+08:00

Yesterday was a rather tiresome day,
but also it was so ENJOYABLE`!

Few days before i was still wondering,
if i should be going back for it or not.
But seems like my decision was right,
i feel so satisfied xD

Some people might not know,
and i might not look like it too,
but seriously i love sports.

The only problem is just that,
i like to play in my own peace,
instead with a bunch of humans.

Anyway the kursus yesterday was really fun,
but i am not going to story much about it.
If you really like to know,
maybe you have to imagine yourself. Lol`

But you know what... ... ...
Obviously i am not the camera holder for these... ... ...

Actually that was a draft,
which i wrote after 6th February, the PS Kursus.
But i was kinda stucked on there that time,
so ended up i post an unfinished entry now.

Anyway i was kinda down for today.
And for some reasons also,
i kinda get myself stucked in Mines for half day alone.

No idea what should i do, nor where should i go.
Just there were alot of thinking,
between me and HIM `

Take on a movie to kill some times in the end,
and there was a freaking funny expression i get,
when i told it is just one ticket i need.

Anyway that sure was some fun,
when you get to watch movie alone ` :)

Woohoo Tiger was unexpected nice,
or maybe i should use Fantastic or Awesome on it.
Hard to believe that it is Malaysian's product,
if 5 stars is max then i will give it 5.

...can you see the light? `
i felt better after the movie,
but there were still some emotional i need to get rid of.
So i remember of SecretRecipe,
and the story behind the Choc.Indulgence i bought for you.

Maybe a Tiramisu can cure me?
But nowaday Tiramisu is hard to find ` :(

Word can cure but most the times, it kills.

Whatever i do i have my reasons,
i don't mind how people say about me,
but i can't stand when my friend get involved.

Though walk away is my style,
as i don't like to kill or be killed.

ps. ...fight ends when there is only one remains `

...this is random enough. i suppose `

2010-02-04T17:58:00.003+08:00

...my doggy can actually breaks the borders ` =.=
Reason of hating Chinese New Year (CNY),
...weather is damn freaking hot when CNY is near `

Lol` that was totally random.
But that is just how i like it :)

Anyway it seriously was so damn HOT lately.
Can't we have one year,
when there are ~~snowy~~ windy for CNY..?

Okayz. i just hate Summer.
Definitely that is not the season for me.

So what about Spring?
Erm` i guess that wasn't good enough.
And somehow i feel like,
it is giving me some creepy-feeling..
(or perhaps i am the one who is creepy...:x)

Anyway i would prefer Autumn instead.
The windy season! :D

And Winter is nice too,
especially when it is snowing!
Hope i can touch the snow for real,
wonder how is it feels like :)

.........................
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.......
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You know, i think i was trying to hide the truth,
that i was freaky boring now ==
Comes up with this random enough entry,
seriously i need some entertainments ._.

ps. ...life turns bore all of a sudden `